Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/10/15/coca-cola-trying-to-mix-maori.html
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Hello darkness, my old friend…
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I am reminded of the time that GM tried to localize their “Body by Fisher” ads and ended up with “Corpse by Fisher.”
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I’ve come to talk with you again…
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Another classic to sit alongside Bite the Wax Tadpole and Pepsi Brings Your Ancestors Back from the Dead.
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I’d like to teach the world to sing
In perfect Maori.
I’d like to buy old Death a Coke
And beg Him “Don’t take me”
That’s the real thing
What the world wants today
(Death’s the real thing)
It’s the real thing
(So we say “Not today”)
It’s the real thing.
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In American English “Hello, mate” translates to a command to have sex. I don’t want to have sex with a soda bottle, too many people end up in the emergency room as it is.
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Corporate Legal Entities are just so adorable when they try to behave like human beings, aren’t they?
(At least when it’s a PR fail we’re admiring. A lot less cute when it’s an environmental or economic snafu)
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A slight adjustment… 
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Came for wax tadpole
Leaving satisfied.
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“Hello, Death.” So… like… sales doubled right?
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Illustration is not Maori.
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Came alive for Pepsi.
Left satisfied.
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maybe they could have found a couple of Maori kids to translate for them.
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This is even better than the time a major shoe company released a new cross-trainer for women called Incubus.
Sometimes there’s a reason nobody’s trademarked that yet.
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Let’s use this as an excuse to learn some Maori history:
(note: Lindy is not what you’d call “woke”, but the history is interesting)
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I always say “kia ora, mate,” while driving my Chevy Nova.
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