It is certainly an explanation, but it’s not an excuse…
That’s awesome to hear!
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Whenever I hear arguments like that, I ask them “when and why did you choose to be straight/ cis /whatever.” They always look confused…
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I am stealing that. I think islands of intolerance explains in a phrase what I experience with my wife and I both being trans. I literally cannot tell who will accept us being trans or not. I have had very right wing conservatives be fine with it, and super left folks lose their shit.
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I can relate to that!
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All the evidence says otherwise and claiming its a choice gives bigots way too much wiggle room to force the undoing of those “choices” they disapprove of.
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Also:
I’ve never met anyone who “chose” to be straight, just like I never met anyone who chose to be otherwise.
We each are what we are, and attempts to dehumanize and marginalize others based on such superficial differences is bigotry. Full stop.
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“We” don’t. But ContraPoints has a wide audience including people who may be just edging out of various bigoted beliefs. I don’t think it’s a bad thing if someone explains them in detail what, exactly, is the problem with the JKR situation.
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The problem is that this isn’t someone saying I chose to be trans or gay, it’s someone else saying that they chose without any knowledge of that persons life. Coercion into living a life as the wrong gender or sexuality is not the same as choosing to live that way.
The radical lesbians would have been OK if they had stayed at choosing to be lesbians for political reasons, but they then went on to denounce trans lesbians and their partners, as well as lesbians in butch/femme relationships for being part of the patriarchy. It very rapidly moved away from “I choose” to “we dictate”.
Maybe I would be clearer about my intent if I said
No one knows who I am better than myself.
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It comes down to respecting others as human beings and their right to agency.
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I think we’re all on the same page here - something in my original post was misworded or misleading.
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And that’s the problem; we each only get to decide what works best for us as individuals.
No group is monolithic, therefore no one individual is capable of speaking on behalf of everyone else.
Deigning to try is not only disrespectful, but it will always be met with vehement opposition.
Maybe try re-reading what you originally wrote; whether intentional or not, it reads as very privileged and self-centered, regardless that you yourself are a part of the LGBTQ+ community.
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That is a bit like the gay panic defense, a “legal” way to defend hate crimes.
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Let me restate it like this then:
When I think about high level strategies for thinking about and discussing gender and sexuality, with the overall aim of a society where people can live in a way that feels most honest to them, defending sexuality and gender solely on the basis of determinism seems incomplete. We should be additionally fighting for, to borrow a phrase from above, people’s right to their own agency. Queerness and Trans-ness should be acceptable regardless of the origin or mechanism.
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I have a way to understand these people, but some won’t like it…
People from discriminated groups obviously want the rights others have, that is simple. What some fail to see is that if they want those right for their own (group) but not for some others what they want is not rights but a share in privilege.
Because any right you want but deny others is a privilege. That is what that word means: privi+lege=private+law
That is exactly what TERFS argue, those rights they have fought for for women should be denied to trans women. That protection under the law is only for (trans-excluded*) women … privilege.
(*Edit: added for clarity)
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Not only does Natalie Wynn fill my old brain with new thoughts; she also fills my heart with humour and beauty. She always goes beyond the call with her production values; even now, during the depths of the Pandemic.
Another video that gave me hope for the world was Abigail Thorn’s latest video (hankies may be required).
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I’ve known leftists who feel perfectly justified in trying to bully and shame others who are outside the(ir) faith.
As with any "no true Scotsman"scenario, I think it’s more sensible to call out leftists when they/we are being assholes than to define leftism as those who aren’t assholes.
What’s really disturbing to think about, is the traditional patterns of bullying taking up the evolutionary challenge and choosing new targets to replace the older ones, like trans instead of gay… instead of going extinct like I wish they would.
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How is that progressive, then?
But this is getting off topic, so maybe let’s get back to it, shall we?
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So, if I am assuming, I apologise, but when and why did you make the choice to be cis a/o straight? Because, obviously, it must be a choice, if not tied to biology.
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And that’s why they’re wrong. They are looking for privilege not equality.
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Framing it as a choice, vs something you’re born to, is a smokescreen for right wingers who want to exclude folks. I think it’s a mistake to even entertain that frame: the burden of proof needs to be on those wanting to draw the lines of exclusion, not the ones being excluded.
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