Cops in small MA town warn about roving rap-battle challengers

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If this is seriously the worst thing going on in your town… can I move there? I can’t rap worth anything (Not even the white boy rap that is country music,) But… dude that actually made me smile.

Are you sure they aren’t part of some kind of reality show or new youtube thing?

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Mom’s spaghetti!

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I blame Hamilton.

(but srsly you guys it’s so good tho)

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You’re comin’ down to Charlton in your cars
Threatenin’ our teens to "spit some bars"
Well the real threat is me - I’m Rap-Master Orange
And… um… well… ahem

Anyhow, enjoy your stay in Charlton.

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Roving Rappers: Honky, don’'t you know, it’s just some dope-ass flow?

Krackerland Kops: Drugs dealers! Get 'em boys!

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Look, if you had one shot or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted in one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?

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Why is this a story from San Francisco news? Unless it’s meant ironically.

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[quote=“doctorow, post:1, topic:75186”]The other men then asked the teens if they wanted to “spit some bars” with them.[/quote]“Well, I probably shouldn’t eat this whole Kit-Kat by myself.”

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“Oh! split some bars…”

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Just because you want to rap doesn’t mean you have to be so confrontational about it.

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It starts with rap battles, then leads to dance offs. Next thing you know “It’s ON!”

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I don’t know much about Charlton, but see also http://mix1041.cbslocal.com/tag/the-wellesley-police-blotter/

Walkin down the street tryin to cope with depression
Yall up in my face and my anxiety’s stressin
How can I engage in rap deescalation?
Wish they had THOSE tips on the radio station.

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Charlton is the place on the Pike where there is always a traffic jam because there is a curve on the highway, and apparently this is too much for people to handle. Pulling off and rapping seems like a good way to avoid road rage.

Cruisin’ in my Prius down the middle of the Pike
What’s that up ahead? Kinda bullshit I don’t like
Safe little town fulla honkies name o’ Charlton
Drop a few beats, motherfuckers dance like Carlton

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Only one thing to do. The cops need to bring in some specialists who can lay down such dope rhymes that the roving band of ne’er-do-wells are put to shame and forced to move on.

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Never forgetti.

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Charlton is a pretty sleepy town, I’ve been through it a few times trying to skirt traffic jams on the Mass Pike.

The very idea of someone driving around looking for a cipher (“rap battle”) in Charlton is weirder than the fact that the police were concerned about “rap battles” breaking out in Charlton.

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I’m thinking if there had been krumping the SWAT team would have come…

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I find it hilariously depressing that rather than think this is just people who are bored in a little town, that they have to immediately point out that it was probably not an abduction attempt. Just so everyone knows that someone is thinking of the children.

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