Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/01/07/dc-comic-creator-regrets-seein.html
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I saw Cats in theaters totally sober (also having never seen the play or heard it before) and my reactions were that as soon as the movie started it’s right in the middle of things and there’s little explanation or setup. So i was just utterly confused from the get-go, later about 1/3rd of the way into the movie i am hit with the realization that all of these “cats” are actually people and they’re all suffering in hell… and they deserve whatever they did. Towards the end of the movie i’m sure that this is a movie about human souls stuck in either hell or purgatory.
I don’t think i would mind watching the movie on edibles but i don’t think that it would make the movie better. It would just serve to make me suffer less because yes, it’s that bad. Glad someone put out the warning not to watch this on psychedelics because that sounds like a journey no one should take.
Edit: I also need to add that the music/instrumentation in the show is (obviously) very dated and it gives the movie a very surreal, nightmarish quality that i can’t quite pin down on why. It just sounds horrid and punishing. The singing is fine mind you, its the backing music that is super weird.
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Most movies are best watched in the theater, early in their run, before the internet spoiler machine can erode the experience.
But I was very glad to have watched Black Hawk Down on DVD on a small screen, it took me 3 or 4 sittings to make it all the way through. Good film, just too intense for a single session.
I loved the Cats soundtrack far more than the live show, but this film sounds a lot like Eraserhead or Mona Lisa Overdrive [edit: Johnny Mnemonic, I mean]to me, best enjoyed as a topic of gossip rather than a cinematic experience.
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By all accounts this movie is terrible, but I can absolutely see it becoming a “so bad it’s good” type classic further down the line.
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[Everyone]
DC comic creatorregrets seeing “Cats”on ‘shrooms
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Is there a movie of “Mona Lisa Overdrive”? The third of Gibson’s Sprawl trilogy? I know there was the terrible “Johnny Mnemonic” and a decent, if low budget, adaptation of “New Rose Hotel”, but I hadn’t heard of any Sprawl adaptations (although Nolan’s “Inception” borrows a lot from “Neuromancer”).
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I believe it was Brad Garrett’s character who said:
“You can’t gouge out your mind’s eye.”
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Maybe? The first half of the movie is not enjoyable even with making fun of it, i went with my roommate and we were there purely for laughs and the first half i was just silent. I suspect that it’s the part of the movie that sticks to being closest to the musical. The 2nd half i enjoyed more as it provides more plot, and this is when me and my roommate kept making jokes to each other.
It’s hard to tell how this would translate to watching it at home with friends though, but based on my experience with watching bad movies with a group i don’t think this would be high on my “to watch” list
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Oops, my bad. Johnny Mnemonic was what I was trying to say.
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I was very, very wrong.
Said everyone that saw that film.
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It’s not the worst movie i’ve seen, but perhaps it might be the worst one i’ve seen in theaters that i can think of. Although i’d say its more strange than bad.
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The first mistake was going to see a bad film that took itself too seriously (?).
I saw When Harry Met Sally opening week on two tabs of acid, and had a great time. It was enjoyable even sober.
Equally dosed while viewing a VHS rental of Evil Dead Ii, and I managed to get through it.
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I call your bluff with Van Damme’s movie Cyborg. 
My friend and I were practically roaring along with the villain during the end fight scene. RAAAWR!
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I haven’t seen that, i think the last Van Damme movie i was in theaters was uhhh… [checks IMDB]… Time Cop. Which is not the best movie but its still fun as hell to watch. Have you seen Double Team though? Holy shit that movie…
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Okay. I fold. 
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I’d not been aware this existed, thank you! (though I should probably save my thanks until I see it 
)
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“Cats” the movie is a pretty faithful adaptation of “Cats” the musical. It has its own flaws and virtues, but it does not fix any of the problems with its source material.
“Cats” the musical is an adaptation of a bunch of goofy poems TS Elliot wrote about cats when he wasn’t being, you know, a Serious Poet. There is no overarching narrative to the poems beyond “hey here are some poems about cats”.
“Cats” the musical adds some vague nonsense to Elliot’s poems about selecting one worthy cat to go on to the Next World. It’s not much of a story. Nowhere near enough to fill out a show by itself. But it’s enough to hang a bunch of excuses for some really fit people to show off their dance moves while wearing skintight leotards painted like cats. And let’s be honest, that’s about all the story a night out at the ballet needs. It was far from being the thinnest narrative my ballet- and musical-loving mother dragged me to.
“Cats” the musical also contains “Memories”, which has far more emotional pull than the rest of the show even comes close to earning.
I am pretty sure “Memories” is a Song of Power whose existence is due to a complicated behind-the-scenes magical conspiracy that fed inspiration to the unwitting pawns of TS Elliot and Andrew Lloyd Webber to enact an important change upon the entire world.
I am not joking about this. Maybe a little. But not much. That song does things far out of proportion to what the rest of the show it’s set within earns.
Sadly “Cats” the movie does a lot of things that get in the way of watching a bunch of great dancers slink around in cat costumes - rapid cutting plus heavy CGI destroys a lot of the tension around watching dance. When it commits to being a crazy animated cartoon it begins to work, some of the sequences are astounding fever dreams. When it spends its time sitting in a theatre with the camera flitting around more mundane dance numbers, with a great dancer in the role of “little kitten who does not know a single one of these big group dances” as the most contrasting thing on the screen, it falls apart and you can start to ask yourself questions like “what the fuck is going on, why is any of this happening, what the hell is a Jellicle cat anyway”.
But it does still have “Memories”. And “Memories” is almost strong enough to pull this version together.
Almost.
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Frankly, he has nobody but himself to blame. You just don´t drop hallucinogetics to watch a movie that is allready a bad trip by itself. It doesn´t make the shitty film more enjoyable but rather enhances the shit that drives you up the wall.
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In theaters? Hmm Howard The Duck? Universal Soldier (though I died laughing at a lot of the kills. Pistol at 1000 yards, head shot. Hip shooting blindly behind you, head shot. Etc)?
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I’m a furry and even I wouldn’t go see that film high.
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