Do not bring a duffel bag full of 40 vacuum-sealed frozen piranhas into LAX

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/05/08/do-not-bring-a-duffel-bag-full.html

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Duh. Everybody knows the legal limit is 30.

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You buried the lead…

"Virgilio Martinez, a renowned Peruvian chef, was interrogated for five hours. " Then the let him proceed on his way with the fish. . Assuming they let him go with the fish because nothing he was doing was is illegal, WHY A FIVE HOUR DETENTION?

ACLU?

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He should have hidden them in a sausage.

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I have seen enough horror movies to know this is how it all begins…

though if you’re going to smuggle fish, everyone knows it’s best to wear a jolly fat suit.
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Customs officers opened Martínez’s luggage after the chef described the package as “bones” and “flesh.”

I know I’d take a second or third look at something labeled “flesh”. I mean, it sounds like if they had just labeled it “snacks”, it probably would have been a no-op.

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Uh, yeah, 5 hours, it WAS frozen.

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Why was he detained at all? It’s none of their goddamned business what frozen food he brings in unless it’s a Customs violation.

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Eh, I can see how customs would be touchy about bringing in animals or produce.

There’s no guarantee that the frozen fish are not harboring invasive snails or something.

Domestically, I once flew with 4 trout in my laptop bag, no issues. (Actually not joking)

5 hours is excessive. I’d agree that this should have been cleared up in 60 minutes, tops.

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Or maybe a restaurant run by The Godfather that only serves endangered species?

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Sounds like they gave him quite a grilling.
Now, if they’d taken his direction and spent that time on the fish everybody could have enjoyed a tasty snack.

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Seems like he ran afoul of what constitutes, “Personal amounts of fish” carried onboard frozen:

https://help.cbp.gov/app/answers/detail/a_id/3619/kw/can%20i%20bring%20in%20fish/session/L3RpbWUvMTU1NzM1NTQ5OS9zaWQvMjJVWHNlZW8%3D

What with all the various smuggling of animals you read about (usually live, frequently endangered), 40 fish in ziploc bags probably looked suspicious. Or… Dare I say… Fishy??

ETA: I also have a vague recollection from River monsters that Black Piranha are not small fish…

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I googled it and you are absolutely correct.

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Do you like frozen piranhas, on an L.A Bound plane?
Don’t declare them to customs- are you acting insane?
Will you be cooking them for dinner, with your epicure mates?
We’ll lock you up for five hours- please don’t try to escape.

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Silly chef, duffel bags are for cocaine!

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FTA:

“What’s inside?” asked one officer.

“Bones,” responded Martinez with a laugh. “Flesh.”

His attempt at humor landed him in a private interrogation room where he was questioned by additional officers.

Customs officers aren’t known for their sense of humor.

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He told them that they were emotional support piranhas.
I don’t understand why that wasn’t enough.

It’s the red eyes. Red eyes are very comforting.

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And really, who among us can say that she has not, at one time or another, smuggled vacuum-sealed frozen piranhas into LAX in order to realize her Iron Chef America fantasies?

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Something’s fishy about this story.

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