DoD public relation's highest-ranking civilian gets community service for stealing license plates and harassing neighbor's nanny


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I know there’s a lot to unpack in this story but for some reason this part caught my attention:

The homeowners, who along with their nanny declined to comment, reported
the crime to police, replaced the plates and paid AutoZone to bolt them on
court records indicate. They repeated this process later that week
after the rear plate was stolen again.

Paid a retail auto parts store to bolt the license plate on? How does that work?

$10 bucks will get you a set of these

Are Washington rich people so inept that they don’t know how to use an allen wrench? Have they never put together an Ikea desk before?


He may be an asshole, but it sounds like he’s also off his meds.


But, don’t we ALL wish that we hadn’t.


Physical labor is for little people. /s


Man, it’s been years since this happened, but somehow I ended up trying to affix my license plate with self-tapping screws that had a significantly different threadcount than the holes I was trying to put them into. Never underestimate a person’s capacity to significantly fuck up what should be an easy task


I wouldn’t trust that guy with a dog, or a cat.


Would you trust him with a rat?


The powerful and important harassing the help in DC? I am reminded of the Richard Berendzen


Not even that!


Not even a bat.

Not in a house, not with a mouse…


Hopefully this little incident makes the next review of his security clearances way more interesting.


I’d always heard DoD work was like having a license to steal, but never heard of anyone taking it so literally before.


And why community service? He has a VERY GOOD PR guy.



Could have been for some more oddball anti-theft pattern, ideally plus a helping of Loctite red. Go to AutoZone to buy them, they offer free installation, and after the story’s been through Chinese whispers it becomes “paid AutoZone to bolt them on.”

I mean, I’d do it myself, but the first thing I do with any newly acquired vehicle is take off the dealer frames. Why do people inevitably leave those on there? (that is, if they’re not upgrading to something even tackier…)


…and not when I’m bending over,
the man is such a louse!


In my case, the dealer frames include a protective plastic coating which keeps the licence plate clean and protected from winter corrosion. I have a frame I’d like to put on, but I don’t know how I’d integrate that with a protective cover.


Perhaps he’s dyslexic and read it as stealing licenses?


Making America great again, one step at a time