Don't pull a Lohan, check yourself with the ultimate party wingman

Originally published at:

…I will never understand drinkers.


I think the poster might be confused on the function of a “Wingman”.


I bought one of these, and now I make sure my BAC level is exactly 0.079 every time I get behind the wheel!

We especially dug that the unit even holds the results of its last 10 tests for a fun walk down memory lane.
If it doesn't record the elephant spending all my money and stepping on my head, it's worthless.

Hey. Hey. Hey. I don’t know that they say about you. But you’re. You’re okay man, man.

This is an improvement. The last version made out with my girlfriend while I was in the bathroom.


Wow BB. Thanks for making the world a safer place …


“Don’t pull a Lohan, check yourself with the ultimate party wingman”

Don’t destroy your figure, voice and a promising career with cocaine?


christ, Boing Boing is turning into Barstool Sports.


This tiny gadget may look like the contraption your doctor sticks in your ear

Wait a minute. My doc was supposed to stick that thing in my EAR?


“Don’t pull a Lohan…”

This is a run-on sentence, you clowns.

We thought about getting one at the house I used to live in but decided against it as we were quite sure it would lead to at least 1 alcohol poisoning death. Remember when using this: It is NOT a competition, nor do you need to see how high it will go.


Which clowns are you trying to point this out to - the ones who wrote it, or those reading it?

I can tell that English is not your first language!

This advertorial has a legit discount - a huge improvement over past BB Store ads - but I don’t believe for a second that the anonymous copy writer purchased one of these at this or any other price.

[quote=“Skeptic, post:13, topic:82840”]This advertorial has a legit discount[/quote]Do you think so? My go-to site for such gadgetry is, and they have what appears to be a very similar unit for half the price, though it’s hard to tell if it is substantially deficient in some regard.

It’s a legit discount on this particular make and model - meaning it’s not one of those fake 98.6% off deals based on insanly inflated original prices. Whether the make and model is a good value relative to other consumer breathalyzers I have no idea.

WTF, BoingBoing? Since when was “not quite blowing the legal limit” a justification for driving drunk? [redacted] that [redacted] gadget. If you’ve had more that about 1 drink per hour, your reaction time and judgement are impaired. Don’t drive. Period.

(and all you HeyICanDriveDrunkJustFine idiots can save the electrons. Don’t bother trolling responses)

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don’t you mean cougar?


see, you use it to convince everyone at the bar to head back to your hotel room for body shots,

i don’t think it will tell you if that is a good idea.

“The Inibriati”?


disappointment is one of the two possible reactions when reading the BB Store texts. the other is to ridicule the copywriters at stacksocial