Don't pull a Lohan, check yourself with the ultimate party wingman


Originally published at:


…I will never understand drinkers.


I think the poster might be confused on the function of a “Wingman”.


I bought one of these, and now I make sure my BAC level is exactly 0.079 every time I get behind the wheel!

We especially dug that the unit even holds the results of its last 10 tests for a fun walk down memory lane.
If it doesn't record the elephant spending all my money and stepping on my head, it's worthless.

Hey. Hey. Hey. I don’t know that they say about you. But you’re. You’re okay man, man.

This is an improvement. The last version made out with my girlfriend while I was in the bathroom.


Wow BB. Thanks for making the world a safer place …


“Don’t pull a Lohan, check yourself with the ultimate party wingman”

Don’t destroy your figure, voice and a promising career with cocaine?


christ, Boing Boing is turning into Barstool Sports.


This tiny gadget may look like the contraption your doctor sticks in your ear

Wait a minute. My doc was supposed to stick that thing in my EAR?


“Don’t pull a Lohan…”

This is a run-on sentence, you clowns.


We thought about getting one at the house I used to live in but decided against it as we were quite sure it would lead to at least 1 alcohol poisoning death. Remember when using this: It is NOT a competition, nor do you need to see how high it will go.


Which clowns are you trying to point this out to - the ones who wrote it, or those reading it?

I can tell that English is not your first language!


This advertorial has a legit discount - a huge improvement over past BB Store ads - but I don’t believe for a second that the anonymous copy writer purchased one of these at this or any other price.


[quote=“Skeptic, post:13, topic:82840”]This advertorial has a legit discount[/quote]Do you think so? My go-to site for such gadgetry is, and they have what appears to be a very similar unit for half the price, though it’s hard to tell if it is substantially deficient in some regard.


It’s a legit discount on this particular make and model - meaning it’s not one of those fake 98.6% off deals based on insanly inflated original prices. Whether the make and model is a good value relative to other consumer breathalyzers I have no idea.


WTF, BoingBoing? Since when was “not quite blowing the legal limit” a justification for driving drunk? [redacted] that [redacted] gadget. If you’ve had more that about 1 drink per hour, your reaction time and judgement are impaired. Don’t drive. Period.

(and all you HeyICanDriveDrunkJustFine idiots can save the electrons. Don’t bother trolling responses)


don’t you mean cougar?


see, you use it to convince everyone at the bar to head back to your hotel room for body shots,

i don’t think it will tell you if that is a good idea.


“The Inibriati”?


disappointment is one of the two possible reactions when reading the BB Store texts. the other is to ridicule the copywriters at stacksocial