Fry: The worst thing about being a slave is you work and they don’t pay you.
Leela: That’s the only thing about being a slave.
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I lived 2 towns over from Hershey as a bobling. The first libertarian tween I ever met was a pupil from the somewhat culty-sounding Hershey Residential Institution for Nebulously Disadvantaged Youth (or whatever it’s called). Also one of the first boys I remember having an explicitly sexual crush on. Obviously nothing came of it, and I imagine the Institution would find that sort of behavior un-Chocolatey.
People sometimes ask if the factory smells good, and the answer is no, it actually smells kina fecal, since it’s Hershey chocolate they’re producing.
What kind of commie hellscape are you picturing that has mailboxes? In Muskgland, TX you’ll pay to have deliveries crashed direct to your home by a private self-piloting drone.
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I’ve heard this story somewhere before…
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I’ve been playing the Cyberpunk 2077 computer game, and reading a lot of the Shadowun novels lately. So my distrust of corporations is even higher than it’s usually high level.
I don’t mind reading abut Corporate Dystopia’s, but I have no desire to actually live in one
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I think living in Muskville would be a lot like living in Squid Game.
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He’s trying to create a literal cult of personality!!! 
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Sorry to bring up a morbid idea, but what if all vehicles in Emperor Elon’s demesne were required to be Tesla vehicle with Full Self Driving enabled (permanently, no human driving allowed) and programmed not to drive out of town without the express permission of Marquis Musk?
The boundaries of town are armed with Not A Flamethrower emplacements to prevent people from walking into or out of town. He may also have tunnels dug by the Boring Company to collapse if a large enough force attempts to enter.
SpaceX launches satellites designed to shoot down airplanes attempting to enter Musktopia. He’d argue he never agreed to the Outer Space Treaty of 1967 and so it shouldn’t bind him.
Damn. This sounds a bit more plausible than I’d thought when I started writing it as a joke.
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Just a few years later, another bored plutocrat decided to build a model company town of his own. Friends cautioned Milton Hershey that Pullman had been a disaster for its owner. Warned that the town’s residents wouldn’t have elected George Pullman dogcatcher, Hershey responded, “I don’t like dogs that much.”
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Waddles getting hugs. I can relate to that, thank you! (I swear I’m getting my meds updated. I have an appointment next Tuesday and everything.)
“Saint Peter dontcha call me cause I can’t go …” That’s exactly the kind of thing I was thinking about. When the everything in sight is owned by one group, that debt is even more than a raw number. Pack up and leave? Who’s going to sell you gas? Food for travel? (Food for staying here and continuing to work can just be added to your tab, of course.) And wasn’t it nice of the company to buy, I mean fund the local police force when they moved in? Now why would I suddenly think of that …?
As much as the general topic is getting to me, I do have to thank you for that. I got chills listening to that! Added to my Deezer playlist, thank you.
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I knew I was not going to be disappointed expecting to see a BioShock reference!
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Well no one is using Phillips, TX anymore, he could just move in there.
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Personally I’m reminded of Walt Disney’s original plan for EPCOT. “Everything would work better if I had total control!” is a pretty common thought. This sort of thing usually doesn’t go any further than a few renderings and floor plans, but sometimes people have enough money or power to get concrete poured.
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The sad thing is there are sycophants out there who will love this idea.
When Musk fires them on a whim and jokes about it on twitter they’ll salute and thank him for making them unemployed and homeless.
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If it ever happens it will probably be your average american suburbian sprawl settlement with some tech slapped on to it. Maybe even some individual spectacular building. It will only serve as a way to hinder any kind of meaningful reform of dysfunctional and wasteful car centric planning and land use.
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Ahem.
The region now called “Texas” is a strange place, historically.
https://www.tshaonline.org/handbook/entries/free-state-of-van-zandt
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Can somebody please tell techbros that cyberpunk is dystopisn.
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This.
Among the ever bigger pile o’ social and economic misdeeds that the man is either directly responsible for or is enabled to enact through his tech bro worshipers, the environmental damage perpetrated by Team Elno is to-date a real statement of what he believes he can get away with. He’s… not wrong.
[insert jorbs.gif] [insert bags_of_money_with_wings_TexasCapitol.gif]
Texas has plenty environmental laws on the books (+ applicable federal laws) and, like a different version of the man himself, Texas has a massive (and much older and better established) Good Ol’ Boy club of enablers who rarely if ever enforce these laws. Whenever it looks like enforcement is about to occur, the GOBs subvert and reduce the legal (and financial) consequences like a very well-oiled derrick eh clock.
Say what y’all will about where various businesses of his are located. But Snailbrook, SpaceX, and whatever other ecological mayhem Texas is all too likely to welcome with open wallets palms hearts minds arms will do real harm to the people who live in Texas, who depend on clean water, clean air, and getting paid to do real work in safe working conditions.
ETA: added more Texas flavor
ETA2: grammar
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