Finns to Trump: We don't rake our forests


Originally published at:


California should use leaf-blowers and blow it all over to Nevada.


make america rake again

(seriously, I hate leaf blowers, rake again please)


Pretty good example of a “truth sandwich”. State the truth first (“The Finns do not rake their forests”), follow it with Two Scoops’ lie, then follow that with more truth that emphasizes the problems with the lie. Excellent, please keep up the good work!


The stupid, it burns… literally.



This is what happens when you have a President whose idea of pristine natural landscape comes with 18 holes and a pro shop.



pun-burnt by non-native speakers, too. That’s gotta hurt a xenophobic isolationist extra…


This is just classic Trump:
He saw something on television (fire-fighters creating fire breaks ahead of the fire), and didn’t understand what he was seeing and develops a child-like interpretation of it.
He decides that his delusional, childish interpretation is the solution to a very real problem.
He falsely attributes the delusional solution to an expert (the president of Finland). [edit: despite the fact that the comparison of a rainy, cold, Arctic circle country with warm, dry, fire-ecology California makes no damn sense even on the face of it.]
His solution conveniently lays the blame on his political enemies (the entire state of California, which didn’t vote for him*), despite the fact that California forests are under federal control, which saw their forest management budget get slashed under his administration.
Even after many many people have pointed out that the fires in California had nothing to do with forests or their maintenance, he continues to harp on about it. Showing that he’s not just an ignorant, delusional idiot, he’s also totally impervious to reality.

*He briefly shows some interest in those afflicted in the North when he’s told that they voted for him, calling them “my people.” (Apparently any American who didn’t vote for him is some sort of enemy outsider.)


Indeed. How divorced from reality do you have to be to, somehow, get the idea that Finland - a country larger than ME, NH, MA, NY, RI, CT, and NJ combined, and most of which is covered in forest - rakes their wildlands? There wasn’t some little niggle at the back of his walnut, jumping up and down scream “No! Stop! That doesn’t make sense!”? Christ, the US can barely manage to rake Central Park, let alone the entire North East.

How divorced from reality do you have to be to think that a country which is in the Sub-Arctic Climatic region, and which has average temperatures below 0°C for 1/3rd of the year, is a comparable model to CA, which is mostly Mediterranean Climate, and an average min temp in the teens.

Fuck sake.


He’s divorced from a lot of things.


Oh, yeah, I get that. The ‘how’ in that sentence is carrying a lot of weight. On the spectrum of "mildly eccentric” through to “batshit insane”, Hair Furore seems to constantly be carving out new niches that are way off the chart.


You want a dead forest? Because that’s how you get a dead forest.


Well, at least he’s too stupid and childish to hide his sexism, racism, bigotry, etc. from any objective observer. That combination serves as a wonderful “safe” warning that may prepare us for a more dangerous demagogue, one better able to conceal his (or, Gods help us, her) fascist truths under better-crafted lies and puffery.

Of course, a warning is only good if it is heeded…


Can we develop a unit of measurement for deviation from reality? Say, the Trump. On this scale, one Trump unit of denial lands you in the vaccine denier, climate change denier camp. A Kilotrump is flat earth territory. Millitrumps are just slightly off kilter, “get off my lawn, you young whippersnapper” types.


What about a Magatrump?


That’s 9/11 or birtherism territory.

Although I’d rebrand it as peaktrump rather than mega trump




pretty sure someone mentioned having to rake the forest as one of those dump pointless tasks they give you during basic training and trump just ran with it


Finland doesn’t get huge forest fires like California for the same reason Alaska doesn’t get huge forest fires-- permafrost, a short summer, wet ground and this thing called “The Arctic Circle.”

Nevertheless, who does Trump think is going to rake millions of square miles of forest, magic woodland elves? Or else he wants the state or the feds to hire people to rake the forests. . . no, he can’t be calling for anything that requires the government spend money. . . .

“Maybe we should get one of those Arctic Circles for California.” – Trump (probably.)