"Gate lice": The insulting nickname airline staff and premier flyers use for eager boarders

Originally published at: Gate lice: Airline slang for impatient travelers - Boing Boing

5 Likes
  1. Anxiety about overhead bin space: Many passengers worry about finding space for their carry-on luggage and want to board early to secure a spot.

It’s that and that alone. The other points are just in there to pad out the list.

This is an interesting solution.

For example, one flight attendant I spoke with anonymously told me she would like to see airlines start charging for carry-on bags and offering free checked luggage to free up space in the overhead bins. “Boarding would be so much faster and easier,” she says.

26 Likes

Some people just can’t wait to get on the plane so they can get started on the raw dogging.

13 Likes

I respectfully disagree. Back when I was traveling a lot more for work, all the reasons on the list were reasons why I would myself exhibit louse-like-behavior, in various combos to various degrees.

My personal opinion is that lice would be fewer and boarding would move faster if they boarded tail to nose; that way people who take more time to sit and settle will also be behind the next group instead of in front, being a bottleneck.

22 Likes

If they allow for free checked baggage I’d happily pay to put my rollaboard in the overhead (where it always fits as designed, despite the rigged carnival game luggage sizers).

Some airlines are starting to go in this direction. However, the executives predictably seem to have trouble foregoing the slightly higher revenue they get from charging for checked bags in exchange for faster boarding and more on-time departures.

But then how would the business class passengers feel special? /s

That aside, I’ve also recently seen this happening once the various privileged groups were seated. Things did indeed move a lot faster than the usual “passengers in the back are steerage” method. Combined with charging for overhead space the situation would be a lot better.

There’s also this suggested efficient boarding method, but it won’t be happening.

10 Likes

That would work on paper only I am afraid.

Besides the marketing issue of “front means more expensive seats and perks including boarding early” , the real problem IS the carry-on luggage and the lack of space on the plane for all of it.
By letting the back seats board before the front seats, too many people would store their carry-ons in the empty front bins, thereforce forcing the later front-seating passengers to have to walk to the back of the plane to store theirs, causing all kinds of jams. It already happens today.

A good solution would be what was suggested, charge through the nose for carry-ons (except underseat small personal items) and offer one checked luggage for free. That would cut the gate lice in half at least I bet.

9 Likes

There are ironic side-effects to this.

In a recent trip, I went with only a carry-on but because of numerous purchases I would have needed TWO carry-ons for the return. So I was going to have to check one of them.
I tried every possible way to pre-purchase a checked bag before the flight, but because I had purchased my flight from a travel agent, bureaucracy forbid either me or him to purchase it , no matter whether it was through the web or phones. So I was stuck with checking it at the counter in the airport for a larger fee, which I presume was the point of all the said bureaucracy.
The day of the trip I went to the counter, and they let me check the second carry-on for free, because they were goint to offer that option to everyone at the gate since the flight was sold out and there wasn’t enough space aboard for everyone’s carry-ons (my second carry-on was out of sight, they must have thought it was the only one).

7 Likes

As someone who pretty much never checks luggage, I fully support the airlines charging for the privilege. I will happily pay the fee to guarantee that there is space for me to not have to wait for my luggage at the end of the flight.

5 Likes

Travel stress: Some individuals, like Pip Davidson mentioned in the article, find travel stressful and are sensitive to crowds. Waiting near the gate helps them cope with this anxiety.

Personally, I am the opposite. As someone who is also stressed out by crowds I keep far away from gate and wait for most people to board and let that area empty out before trying to get on the plane. But that is just me.

8 Likes

Re category 2, aren’t parents with young children routinely called to board first?

7 Likes

Air travel is a goddamned nightmare.

17 Likes

No carry on, I presume? Or do you not mind having to check it in because overhead space is all gone?

3 Likes

It’s an offensive name designed to blame passengers for the flaws of the airlines and airports. The solutions are much simpler, though not always possible.

  1. Make it clearer which group is currently boarding through prominent signage. Have you ever arrived late to the gate or come back from the bathroom and you can’t figure out if your group already boarded? Every so often I see the monitor at the gate say Now Boarding Group 3 and instead of crowding in to see what’s going on I immediately know what’s up. “Gate Lice” is not a thing with Southwest (RIP) who manage the process vigorously. It’s somewhat alleviated by the lanes used by United.

  2. There’s often just not enough space at the gate to accommodate the people who are actively boarding and the people who want to anxiously stand nearby. Gate lice is less of a thing at newer/larger airports where they have built enough space.

14 Likes

The anxiety of the crowd is more than my anxiety for finding a space for my carry on. Most of my travel for the last few years has been driving my mother to her trailer in Florida for the winter and then flying back and then returning to drive her back to Canada again. I have a closet full of clothes I keep there so I am fortunate enough to travel pretty light.

5 Likes

That last word is important. A lot of the anxiety over checking bags comes from the expectation of a long wait at the carousel at a lot of airports. For some reason, the more “state-of-the-art” an airport’s shiny new baggage handling system, the longer the delays and the more frequent the breakdowns.

This is an area where airlines might throw their weight around a little, but won’t.

5 Likes

This is essentially what I already do; I am usually flying with a musical instrument, which cannot be checked. So I usually end up paying extra for whatever priority boarding an airline offers. Anything more than the current $20 or so that costs would simply be punishing musicians who have no choice.

12 Likes

Southwest had the solution, and instead of other airlines emulating them, they are giving up the best thing about themselves and going back to what everyone else does.

7 Likes

Problem is this doesn’t solve item 1. Most people are trying to board early to guarantee they can get their carryon in an overhead bin near their seat, and the best way to do that is to get on the plane early. I expressly pay extra for priority boarding for this very reason. I’m lucky to be able to afford to do that, but that doesn’t help the many other passengers who cannot or will not do so.

Charging for guaranteed overhead bin space would seem to be a solve here though, but I bet it won’t work because of what the airports likely charge for checked baggage processing.

The compromise of gate-checking carryons for free works, and I’ve used it. Once I don’t have a carryon to put in an overhead bin I couldn’t care less when I board!

8 Likes

Good points - and welcome!

4 Likes

I readily admit that when I travel it isn’t short trips, but usually for 2+ weeks to a developing nation, so carry on isn’t really an option. The only thing I bring into the cabin with me are valuable electronics: computer, phone, switch, , which go under the seat. Everything else, including contact solution goes into cargo. But people taking their sweet time and blocking the aisles (plane, grocery store, wherever) drives me up the wall.

6 Likes