How to make the perfect chocolate chip cookies while being spied on by the government

Originally published at: How to make the perfect chocolate chip cookies while being spied on by the government | Boing Boing

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Hunh! Even I am more paranoid than THAT!

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So basically an instagram version of Weird Al’s Foil video from 8 years ago?

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Quiz: What airport am I in that celebrates this as a key (deep?) state accomplishment?

PS it looks like he is pouring in dark chocolate chips but the resulting cookies look like milk chocolate. Clearly a sign that this was filmed on the moon on Kubrick’s sound stage where they faked the moon landing.

ETA: because the moon is made of cheese, a dairy product. Wake up, sheeple!

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also, the prominent mention of the number 415… WHAT DOES IT MEAN???

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OMG! IT’S SAN FRANCISCO’S AREA CODE!

THE GAY RAINBOW MAFIA IS INVOLVED!

so very /S

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The whole thing is a government conspiracy. He didn’t include nuts, so it clearly can’t be the best chocolate chip cookie recipe. That’s the giveaway.

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OMG!
THAT MUST BE IT!!

wake up, sheeple!

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A chocolate chip cookie with nuts can’t be the best because nuts don’t belong in chocolate chip cookies.

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More confirmation! Clearly you are part of the government conspiracy as well! I shall drape my phone in tinfoil to protect it from your deviant cookie theories!

It’s not your phone, weren’t you listening when Kellyanne Conway explained it? It’s your microwave.

“What I can say is there are many ways to surveil each other now, unfortunately,” she said. “There was an article this week that talked about how you can surveil someone through their phones – certainly through their television sets, any number of different ways. And microwaves that turn into cameras, et cetera.”

And the man in the garberdine suit, his bow tie is really a camera.

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I would be much more impressed for anyone to do anything and post it online without the US government seeing it.

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