How to walk in high heels

Those are the Sun King’s heels. They are whatever he says they are, or off with your head!

But of course he said they were flats, and that he was exceptionally tall. The man set fashion for the present day - men’s neckties exist mostly because Louis had an unsightly goiter on his neck.

Exactly. You can’t really know if there’s any relationship to reality in the whole painting. I wouldn’t be surprised if the heels shown are significantly lower than the real things were, though - I imagine the point of the heels was partly to make his butt and calves look sexy to the ladies, but they were definitely intended to make him appear taller than his courtiers, which effect is spoiled if his portrait shows 9" heels! Louis was 5’4" but with his heels and wig on he was the size of Peter the Great - nearly seven feet tall.

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What a fascinating topic. Now, as I’ve said, it’s folly to consider what I would do if I were a completely different person, but yet I really want to say: 'No, not me, I’d go all out on the heels. And while I’d be at it, I’d hone my femininity to nasty-sharp edge. I’d want to be a bombshell.

Now why do I feel so hell-bend on making this point? Is it jealousy, because I am not a male bombshell and even if I were it would be -as as a man- much more inconsequential? Really, maybe it’s spite over having been on the receiving end of manipulatively used weapons-grade femininity.

Maybe I’m jealous that there is no male counterpart for the sexual fascination of high heels.
Maybe heels are just sexually fascinating, and that’s the only thing giving wings to this conversation.

[sigh] Anyway, oh, sex driven hominid brain (of mine) don’t you have anything else to do?

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Men can wear them too, ya know. Why not give them a try?!

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Yes, sure, but it wouldn’t be the same. People would just think I’m weird, and not at all that I’m foxy, and a sexy beast.
(And I don’t want everyone to know that I’m a weirdo, got to keep some privacy, ne?)

6 posts were split to a new topic: “Weapons-grade femininity”

she had a teletype? i think i missed that.

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She’s an amateur.
How to walk in high heels by marence

  1. Start by standing on your tiptoes from age 3 or so whenever you dance. Dance a lot. Have lots of Barbies* and think high heels are the norm for women in fashion.
  2. Grow to have ginormous feet and long muscular legs, so a 3 inch heel looks like a kitten heel does on a size 6 foot. Dance in high heels a lot.
  3. Find that dancing in high heels brings more compliments than the sum of all other attributes. Do it even more.
  4. Develop terrible terrible osteoarthritis & loss of cartilage in the knees. Stop wearing heels because of pain.**
  5. Find yourself unable to dance with flats, and go back to dancing barefoot and on tiptoe, like a child.
  • Barbie was a fashion doll.
    **and doctors explaining how stupid I was to wear 3-6" heels for work and on the weekends too, and what damage it did.
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How to walk in high heels? Don’t. Value your comfort and safety over hyper-sexualised, over-marketed foot torture in the name of fashion.

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Seriously.

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oh gurl I need those

I just bought these as I am told they are the holy grail of ballet flats. We’ll see; that’s not a shoe type that generally works for me.

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I’ll play:

I’ve run about a thousand miles in these shoes since getting them last year. I could never do that in high heels.

Seriously though, I need new shoes.

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I painted these shoes with that Black 2.0 paint, diluted. Probably gonna keep doing that until they fall off of my feet. I love me a lazy slipper that I can wear out of the house.

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I’m currently barefoot! But was just out at a street art fair wearing Merrell sandals.

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What’s the brand?

The ankle stuff, plus boxed toe, look perfect for keeping the shoes on without curling one’s toes.

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I actually just bought these today:

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(teehee)

These have been my main shoe this year. They are older than I am. I really need to figure out how to properly affix new straps. For years I have been accustomed to all of my clothes being completely silent, so I have had to learn to embrace that “karan koron” sound.

70s carpet FTW!

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I love Merrell. I have a pair of Merrell boots that are holding up well. They usually last a couple years at least.

My previous boots were more fashionable, but only lasted a matter of weeks.

Other than that, LL Bean makes good boots. Doc Martens IME cost next to nothing but don’t hold up well.

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Jessica Simpson “Mandalaye”.

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Thanks!

 

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You don’t need arch support, the arch is the support.