Hypnotic breast enlargement

Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2016/09/28/hypnotic-breast-enlargement.html

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Amateur. Everyone knows that penile hypnotism is where the real money is.

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It reminds me of a Peanuts strip (or maybe one of the cartoons) that I am unable to find.

Charlie Brown goes to Lucy for advice. Lucy demands five cents. Charlie Brown doesn’t want to pay, as it’s just a few words of wisdom that he’s seeking, not anything worth money. Lucy then harangues Charlie Brown about the value of advice, and tells him that she needs to get the five cents to make the business legitimate, and all of that. Finally, Charlie pays up, and Lucy offers the following words of wisdom:

A fool and his money are soon parted.

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Reminds me of comic book ads we used to get. :rolling_eyes:

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Follow the swinging, um, pendulum. You are getting veeeery sleeeeeeepy…

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A guy sees a booth: “Life, $5” so he pays $5. The guy in the booth just stands there looking at him. “Well?” asks the customer “Aren’t you going to give me anything?”

“No” says the guy in the booth. “That’s life.”

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What if our breasts aren’t hypnotic?

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Hypno the Rapist? I think women should better steer from from him!

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Wait, is this for any breasts, or only breasts that are already hypnotic?

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Huh. It occurs to me these both show up in Calvin & Hobbes.

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“My eyes are up here.”

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Probably get more efficient if you just hypnotize guys to see large breasts everywhere.

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More efficient still: Hypnotize the patient to believe their breasts have gotten larger and to not notice objective measurements. This is actually doable, as long as the subject is adequately suggestible.

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“Your breasts are getting very sleepy…very sleepy…”

This crap is still available, though:

A safe, and permanent solution to increase your breast size 1-4 inches. (one or two cup sizes) on three CDs that will help you to become a believer!

This new method will take you deeper and produce a more profound state of cell communication. The growth takes about 8-12 weeks and is permanent.

wendi.com/html/breast_enlargement.html

Pure, 100℅ bullshit. Trump level, grade A bullshit.

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That’s the beginning and end of those CDs though. If you want to go along with the program they can brainwash you if you’re very good at being brainwashed, but that’s about it.

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I think I’d rather go with Boobie Chew. Seems more plausible…

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