Iced tea company stock soars after renaming itself "Long Blockchain"

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2017/12/21/iced-tea-company-stock-soars-a.html

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Since Long Island Ice tea doesn’t contain any tea, at all, maybe it’s all right if this thing doesn’t contain any blockchain?

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I feel like this is the start of a joke, but I can’t figure out the punchline.

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“while you were having premarital sex-” love it.

To be relevant, a reminder:
“The market can remain irrational longer than you can remain solvent”

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“How do you make bubble tea without tapioca pearls?”

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Hey ladies! My name is Arduenn Blockchain!

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Sigh…

“A fool and his money are soon parted. ”

At least this boost in stock price will give the company the funds it needs to start R&D on blockchains! /s

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how long until rappers are dropping blockchain in their rhymes?

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Iced tea what you did there.

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Have you started re-posting stories from The Onion? Because this sure SOUNDS like an Onion story…

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The thing is that most stocks are now traded by quants, which semi-automate the process. It’s entirely possible a piece of software is at least in part picking stocks based on company names. This might be the first example of search engine optimization for the stock market. Because, you know, the stock market isn’t fucked up enough already.

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Oh god it’s the Zapata portal all over again.

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Gives one a lot of confidence in the stock market. Yup.

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Hey these guys were savvy enough to trademark “Long Island Iced Tea.” I dunno how good the tea is, but the marketing is epic.

Do kids still say epic? They do, don’t they?

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No, reality just busted through the Poe barrier about a year ago. We’re just living the culturally radio-active fallout of it.

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543358356

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Blockchain is actually a pretty good name FOR a rapper.

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synergize those paradigm radicalizations, my intuitive and innovative motivator!

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I’m merely facilitating customer-centric dialogue between contributors and stakeholders, allowing them to focus their synergies around an agile culture of ROI centric consumer satisfaction!

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2 chainz will announce his name change before the year’s end.

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