If You See Something (IRL), Post Something! (Part 1)

Do continue. I, at least, am entertained.

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Well, I see that it’s my favorite time of day…
One%20two%20three%20four

Because it’s ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

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A side of cheese curds, please. For the puppy.

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Mmmm. Cheese curds. Luckily the closest Freddy’s is a good chunk of town away from me, so I can resist the temptation. But… Culver’s is pretty close…

if5iSSd

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Okay, I’ll go on…

This is from the same “antique” shop that had the whimsical celeb/booby furniture that I shared above, but not the same seller.

I don’t speak Spanish. I took a class in high school, however due to changing schools/cities in mid-semester and going from a class where they were focused on teaching the students to read Spanish to a classs where they were teaching them to speak it, and me being horribly behind, I failed that shit hard. I wanted to drop the class, but my career councillor convinced me to keep it. That lead to my only “F” and a great anger within me. Thanks, buddy! You rocked at your job.

That’s a long way of saying I don’t know exactly what this painting says; I used Google Translate, but I believe it’s missing some details.

Here’s the painting:

And here’s the translation:

To the divine face I dedicate this to him in his honor for sawing the miracle that my wife the police did not confront me with his wife in the bed and when I heard him I could go out the window. And he never found out.

And the text, which might be incorrect since the painter didn’t consistently believe in the space between words:

Al divino rostro le dedico este en su onor por aserme el milagro de que mi vesino el policia no me incontro con su mujer en la cama yal oirlo ilegar pude salir por la ventana. Y nunca se entero.

So if anyone who speaks Spanish better than my “not at all” would like to provide an accurate translation, I would love to see it.


Also, the BBS has given me my first warning:

I’m trying, BBS! I’m trying!

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Your translation is pretty good. I would translate it as:

To the Divine Face I dedicate this in his honor for granting me the miracle that my neighbor the policeman did not catch me in bed with his wife and that when I heard him entering the house I was able to escape out of the window and he never knew about it.

Go on!

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Thank you! Now I wish I had bought it. I’ll have to make it over there this weekend and see if it’s still there. As well as see what else has arrived.

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If you’re having an affair with a policeman’s wife, doing a painting telling the story might not be a wise move.

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That’s funny, I was walking by a planet fitness and almost took a picture of a hand-shaped chair for this thread.

Tyrannosaur Vs Trump
(The shop makes dioramas with succulents and miniatures but this lives on their desk.)

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When I saw this, my first thought was of J. Maarten Troost’s description of kava being pressed through a gym sock, but I doubt that’s what the sign maker had in mind.

My best guess is that cava is a phonetic spelling of cover spoken with a Boston accent. Or maybe cava has a relevant meaning in some language I don’t know? Whatever. I like everything about this sign- the odd spacing, repeated entreaties, haphazard edges, the nonsense of its central message.

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Dali print out for recycling this morning. Somehow the presentation, particularly the coffee stains and warping feels very Dali…

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I don’t know, perhaps getting piss drunk helps.

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That’s pretty cool! What is it? Part of a larger statue?

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I’ll have to do some digging in my files when I’m home, I’ll post something over the weekend.

Adultery-wingman Jesus? Still better than Supply-side Jesus, I suppose…

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To be fair, that’s one sad looking floating Jesus head. He might be less of a wingman, and more of an involuntary accessory after the fact.

“Awww, dude… what? Awwww, My Full Name! Fine. You lit the candle, so I got your back, but I better see you in church on Sunday. You should split; I hear boot steps in the hallway.”

Also, that guy sure looks like he’s climbing in the window, and not out. Like an extra rapey Dracula. But really, that’s just one of many things wrong with it.

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