That sounds like the back story of The Private Eye from Marshal - Law Kingdom of the Blind, which was the Pat Mills/Kevin O’Neill take on Batman
Please, someone make this instead.
It is the 41st Millennium. For more than a hundred centuries The Emperor has sat immobile on the Golden Throne of Earth. He is the Master of Mankind by the will of the gods, and master of a million worlds by the might of his inexhaustible armies. He is a rotting carcass writhing invisibly with power from the Dark Age of Technology. He is the Carrion Lord of the Imperium for whom a thousand souls are sacrificed every day, so that he may never truly die.
Yet even in his deathless state, the Emperor continues his eternal vigilance. Mighty battlefleets cross the daemon-infested miasma of the Warp, the only route between distant stars, their way lit by the Astronomican, the psychic manifestation of the Emperor’s will. Vast armies give battle in his name on uncounted worlds. Greatest amongst his soldiers are the Adeptus Astartes, the Space Marines, bio-engineered super-warriors. Their comrades in arms are legion: the Imperial Guard and countless planetary defence forces, the ever vigilant Inquisition and the tech-priests of the Adeptus Mechanicus to name only a few. But for all their multitudes, they are barely enough to hold off the ever-present threat from aliens, heretics, mutants - and worse.
To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. It is to live in the cruelest and most bloody regime imaginable. These are the tales of those times. Forget the power of technology and science, for so much has been forgotten, never to be re-learned. Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for in the grim dark future there is only war. There is no peace amongst the stars, only an eternity of carnage and slaughter, and the laughter of thirsting gods.
6 Likes
That is the best comment reply I have ever gotten.
It’s like a little mini novel. I feel like I’m reading something from Warhammer 40K. In fact that coincidence is too direct I’m thinking that’s what this is, but regardless you still took the time to write it.
Thanks! 
4 Likes
No coincidence - it is, in fact, Warhammer 40k.
3 Likes
Man, The Onion’s political news section has been dark lately…
5 Likes
I am glad you enjoyed it, alas, it is not me who wrote it. It’s an introductory text that appears on most Rule books for 40k Imperial Armies. I always get a chuckle out of it.
Edit: And thanks for not putting it past me to even come up with such effective prose!
5 Likes
This topic was automatically closed after 5 days. New replies are no longer allowed.
