Ladies and Gentlemen, The VengeCycle

Kickstarter for all open-carry fans: The VengeCycle explosive handlebars for the discerning cyclist. Designed to blow the hands of your bicycle thief when they cycle your stolen bike out of it’s geofence. Truly, a wonderful thing


make sure to check that unlicensed use of explosives is legal in your state beforehand.

Now I’m mildly curious how many of these states are left.

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you want me
to put a bomb in my handlebars
and then also install a tracking device?

gonna have to go with no.


From the makers of MagnaVolt®!

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Handlebars? I want the entire frame to come apart when it is stolen, but only after it has hit 10 mph or 5 minutes of riding (whichever comes first).

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What part of “SHALL NOT BE INFRINGED” don’t you understand?



A Second Amendment argument would make for an interesting court case, but this device seems designed to DEPRIVE people of arms.


My new project is the Vlad-I-cycle…
Similar to the Vengecycle, once it leaves a predefined area the device activates by launching a missile through the seatpost.


Yes, I thought about making that joke, but I felt it was in poor taste.
I think it’s more in the “explosive bolts” category of explosive. The handlebar is designed to detach from the bike. It’s not designed for producing shrapnel.

I dunno. I think if that were the case they’d make more mention of making the bike unrideable, or perhaps mention skinned knees and such. Instead:

Sounds like they really want to cause hand damage with this.

I mean, they show it going into the handgrips, not into, say, the gooseneck joint.

Ah, the “Pee-Wee Herman” approach.


I’m sorry. pure speculation on my part. We all need a lot more detail-- unless one of us is disturbingly familiar with

And where is the link to your Kickstarter?


Or this, which is a real thing.

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I remember the blaster. About a week after it went commercial carjackers switched to just sniping people from across the street, instead of tossing them from their car and leaving them alive.

Law of unintended consequences.

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