Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2024/06/27/las-beloved-pinks-hot-dogs-roasted-by-savage-food-critic.html
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I agree with him, but all of this has been known for a long time. It’s an over-priced tourist-trap hot dog stand, without the saving grace of being housed in a giant replica of the product it serves (which is, in contrast, a classic SoCal cultural experience). I think my family went to Pink’s once after we arrived in L.A., but I haven’t had any reason to return in the intervening decades.
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Still doesn’t hold a candle to the Pulitzer-winning prose of the late, great Jonathan Gold, though.
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Thanks. That was some excellent, stomach-churning writing.
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Gold’s book “Counter Intelligence”, which is a collection of his reviews is a great read.
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He was a great writer, so it’s pretty impressive that the essence of his work could be boiled down to two words that were engraved on his tombstone:
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That’s right up there with “Teenage dreams so hard to beat”.
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I would like to try a US hot dog some day, to find out what the fuss is about. Are they as good as German Wurst or British Bangers?
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Aw, RIP John Peel.
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I miss Scooby’s Hot Dog’s in Hollywood 
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The average US hot dog is a bland and tasteless puree of the parts of the animal left over after every other product has been made. The kosher ones are a bit better, because there’s a limit to how awful the offal can be, They mainly exist so you can put stuff on them.
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I used to work across the street from there in the '90s. It was a serviceable hot dog place, really the thing to get was the polish dog or one of the weird burgers with pastrami, chili, and sausage on it. Curious to see if it has gone downhill, but not curious enough given the number of places I like that don’t require a trip to Hollywood.
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I last ate there about a year ago. It was fine as long as you’re not expecting anything too amazing. Despite the reviewer calling their dogs “expensive monstrosities” their basic chili dogs are $7.50, which is no bargain compared to a Costco dog, I guess, but still a perfectly normal price for food in Los Angeles. Plenty of places charge more for worse food.
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No. In addition to the putrid ingredients @Ceran_Swicegood mentions, every hot dog is also composed of 50% nostalgia vaguely resembling American flags and a passel of pre-teens on bicycles with scabby knees.
Now, having said that, there are a few things you can look out for such as a natural casing, all-beef (or beef-pork if you prefer) and a few brand names that are worth looking out for (which around here basically just consists of Boar’s Head natural casing). You’ll also run into regional fanatics such as in the New York area, Sabrett or Nathan’s are either loved or despised by half the population, but in reality you would have a very hard time distinguishing them in a blind tasting. If you’re going to have one, Chicago is the place to do it. Not because they’re better dogs, they just have the toppings down to an art.
American hot dogs are to Bratwurst what American beer is to a Czech Pilsner. There’s a vague semblance at a distance, but the first taste puts you off of any association whatsoever.
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In the Buffalo area the go-to is Salen’s, while just to the east in Rochester it’s Zweigle’s. It’s kind of wild how many regional hot dogs there are in just New York state.
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My BF buys Angus hot dogs when they’re on sale, and they are amazing, even tho they’re only Ball Park brand.
We sometimes make meaty chili to put on 'em. I’ll cut up an onion & set out any mustards we have. If we have shredded cheese, I’ll set that out, or slice some. If we have them, I’ll also set out guacamole and/or toum (Middle Eastern garlic spread). He likes relish, so I also make that available for easy application.
I miss our late lamented toaster oven - I always toasted the buns.
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The WWW barely existed when that review was written. They dragged it up from the morgue and formatted it for the modern web.
What a great review! I loved the bit of period detail about the pastrami flap spattering your favorite tie with orange goo. I don’t bet many LA Times reporters wear a tie these days.
As for hot dogs, one must regard the wisdom of the Iron Chancellor on the creation of this cuisine.
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I lived in Hollywood just north of Pink’s for years in the 1980’s. It was OK, but not great. I do not understand the long lines of people that now form there, but seeing the many 8 x 10 photos posted there has a certain appeal. I would suggest instead going to an original Tommy’s and getting a chili cheeseburger for a better Los Angeles food experience. There is one on Hollywood Boulevard just west of the 101 / Hollywood Freeway.
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Same reason people hike to the Hollywood sign. It’s not an especially breathtaking hike, but it’s a pilgrimage to a famous Hollywood landmark.
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I made the pilgrimage there once, just because that’s what you do. It has now been checked off my list and I have no reason to bother going there again. Now, The Donut Man in Glendora of somewhat similar SoCal fame to Pink’s is a different story. I make that trek annually.
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