Magic cocaine rides the wind into Florida woman's purse


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/04/09/magic-cocaine-rides-the-wind-i.html


Man uses GPS trackers to catch air conditioner thief
#2

floridabb


#3

Don’t worry Bugs: climate change is gonna do that for us.
Just might take a bit longer (can’t happen soon enough imho)


#4

I’m fairly certain that at least half the reason to write this article was to see how many slang variations for cocaine @SeamusBellamy could come up with. Just a hunch. :slight_smile:


#5

I was just thinking he must be one cool cat, daddy-o. Betcha his kids are more impressed than mine.


#6


#7

It wasn’t hers, see? She was on her way back from the magic kingdom and she met this far out guy- he had these big ears and white gloves and was really friendly- and he gave her the magic cocaine to hold while he went and mopped up a spill on top of Bald Mountain.


#8

that was a snowstorm of synonyms in that post


#9


#10

Aha, but clearly you haven’t embraced the explanatory power of the multiverse.
In an infinite multiverse this improbable event is happening literally all the time.


#11

#12

Schrödinger’s high.


#13

you do realize that means floridian refugees right? i’m sure a few of them can swim


#14

Guard: Where’d you get the cocaine?
Arthur: (somewhat taken aback) We found it.
Guard: Found it? In Florida? The cocaine’s tropical!
Arthur: What do you mean?
Guard: This is a temperate zone!
Arthur: The swallow may fly south with the sun, or the house maarten or the plummer may seek warmer climes in winter, but these are not strangers to our land!
Guard: Are you suggesting that cocaine migrates?
Arthur: Not at all! It could be carried.
Guard: (indcredulous) What, a swallow, carrying cocaine?


#15

Of course cocaine migrates of its own intention; that’s why it’s called marching powder.


#16

I will never understand people who smoke weed while transporting incarceration’s worth of narcotics. It must be a special combo of pronoia, indiscipline and stupidity.


#17

Given the special sensitivity of police officers’ noses to the scent of wacky baccy, I doubt one really has to have smoked green at any time in the recent past.

Once you’ve been pulled over for swerving all over the road, the police will happily say they smelt treefer and use it as justification for their search. Who is to say they didn’t?


#18

Let’s face it, her explanation is no more unreasonable than 99% of the gaslighting coming from our bloviating president and his administration.


#19

Posey?

Ahh, they grow up so fast, don’t they Cory :^)


#20

Cuba can take them in.