I love super crispy, almost burned, snapping-crispy bacon.
David Lynch
If I were a bit more enthusiastic about magical thinking, Iâd be openly entertaining the notion that perhaps an unlikely accidental burn during prayer should tell you something about your deityâs opinion of your devotion.
Yes, but I think the end result would be âI just wasnât praying hard enoughâ.
on twitter i saw someone say that âman burned by applebees fajitas while praying canât sueâ was the most american headline in the history of headlines. i have to agree.
Oh, lord.
I feel God in this Applebeeâs tonight.
I really donât get that form of public prayer, as it is almost invariably Christians, and of the few things anyone has of Jesus saying, one of them specifically condemned public praying as intentionally ostentatious for self-righteous purposes, eg, making a social statement about how âholyâ you are. Which is the exact stench that comes from people who do this, besides the added one I just noted.
And⌠it has the whole âI think everyone here who is not doing this is clearly bad, while I am goodâ thing about it. It is disgusting.
Some obvious caveats, such as when one is just blending in, or has no choice.
But I believe this was in regards to Pharisees who prayed in public as part of their âholier than thouâ act. I think it all comes down to your actual intent behind praying. If youâre doing it out of genuine love and respect for God, fine. But if itâs just about showing off, then no.
I have to wonder how badly burnt someone could get from splatter just off a hot plate. I mean, youâd get a few tiny drops of hot grease, then youâd move your head away, I should think. Itâs not like he had a large quantity of boiling oil jetted into his face. Which makes me think this was something of a frivolous lawsuitâŚ
I might see how this could happen if one was unfamiliar with fajitas or their service. But fajitas sizzle so freakinâ loudly when theyâre served (essentially screaming âIâm hot, dammit, Iâm hot!â) that I canât fathom putting my face near them for a bout of make-believe or for any other reason.
The 73rd Commandment of Jimbobbery reads thus: putteth always thine face near to food served thee, and inhale mightily. Let thy pleasure and anticipation be verbally known, lest thine server be offended, and praise the StarMind that the universe was found to be in so beneficial a configuration. Worry not of flame or sizzling oil or roiling steam; if the spirit is pure, the flesh prevaileth.
The restaurant must have used Dominicans. They roll them too tight.
How one reacts after being, uh, smote upon just when proclaiming oneâs devotion would, in fact, be the perfect test of faith.
âIâm at your mercy, God --ow! Hey, buddy, youâre responsible!â
Perhaps one day it will occur to him, to pray for some brains. Not that it will help.
Great, I canât wait till the day sizzling plates of delicious smelling fajitas need to arrive at the table covered by a âDO NOT STICK YOUR FACE IN THE FAJITAS DUMBASSâ disclaimer.
Didnât something like that happen during the trials of Job? He was covered with boils âfrom the soles of his feet unto the crown of his head.â
He whom the Lord loves most gets fajita-spattered the most.
Why does somebody elseâs quiet prayer make you feel as if youâre not doing something you should? That feeling isnât inside the prayer - itâs inside you.
And⌠it has the whole âI think everyone here who is not doing this is clearly bad, while I am goodâ thing about it. It is disgusting.
Well, I surely appreciate your capacity for honesty.
rolls eyes
Next?
:
Or His opinion of Applebeeâs. Which I can get behind.
Hot grease in your face is a sign. Leave now to avoid the suffering which shall follow if you eat them.
The problem with that is - Whoâs going to admit (even to themselves) that theyâre just showing off ?
