Montana is so afraid of fake nipples they want to jail people who show them in public

On the upside, no more truck nuts!


Reasonable persons would not be offended. So there.


That would apply to men, too. Hope it doesn’t get too hot in Montana this summer

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Any Cuban bakeries in MT?
The Dulce de Leche Kiss at Porto’s Bakery


Talk of wearing prosthetic naughty bits in public makes me think of this scene from Catherine Zeta-Jones’ movie The Rebound.

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I can’t find the link right now but I was reading recently about ‘milk-lines’ in the male and female anatomy and that an incredibly high percentage of both male and female homo sapiens have ‘superfluous nipples’ that are lesser pronounced but are ‘there’. I found one about parallel to my lower ribcage. Does that mean I have to wear a t-shirt in public for the rest of my life so’s not to ‘offend’ any cosmic schmucks?


There go my summer plans :frowning:

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If you read the bill, you’d see that nursing mothers are specifically exempted.

Speedos are actually the common ground I find with the yoyo. Those things should be illegal.

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Your reply almost makes sense, until you consider that this proposed law is a solution in search of an actual problem.


That would require a mastery of fire. So, no.


I’m fairly certain this law is designed to make life difficult for strip clubs and has nothing to do with people wearing fake nipples in the streets. Strip clubs have been creatively working around local laws for a long time.

Nipples must be “covered?” OK, strippers wear clear plastic stickers. Covering must be opaque? OK, strippers wear tiny pink stickers over the nipple only. Nipples AND areolas must be covered? OK, strippers wear realistic fake nipples… And my personal favorite: Nudity is banned in bars but not in art classes? OK, the club passes out free pencils and tablets.


Montana has the country’s highest suicide rate.


What do you expect from a state where the online porn rate exceeds that of New York and yet the most searched porn topic is “compilation”?


Think of the children! Would you want to live in a world where BABIES might see nipples, rubber or otherwise?


Mostly because every suicide accounts for 1% of the population of Montana.


This makes no sense.

I have mamillaphilaphobia - I’m afraid of people who like nipples.

Or is it mamillaphobaphilia - the love of people who fear nipples? I can never remember.

Visiting my parents in Toronto, I added “areola” to my father’s weekly shopping list. I told him it was a type of granola and that if he couldn’t see it in the cereal aisle, that he should just ask for help.