'Nearly toothless' Florida woman, 61, bites burglar, 34 (she's okay, he's in jail)

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/08/07/florida-woman-bites.html

“I’ll be more careful from now on when I open my door. I’ll open my door with my Taser because I have one.”

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She’s a geriatric alligator.

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I missed the L and the A, wondered what restaurant would serve an old toothless woman a 34 year old burger and how they knew it was that old.

Being nearly toothless at 61 says everything you need to know about American healthcare.

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Whereas being nearly toothless at 31 says everything you need to know about Canadian hockey!

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Everyone knows full face masks aren’t cool!

Even half visors are for Swedes :crazy_face:

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…Gerigator? Piranhma?

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Sounds like my kinda gal.

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The crook doesn’t know how lucky he was that the lady wasn’t radioactive. When you’re a man in his thirties and you start turning into a grandma, everything changes, let me tell you, dear.

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  1. Good on her.

  2. Why is there still a “Race” in the inmate listing? What if he was 1/4 caucasian or hispanic? Is “B” for Black? Belgian? BRO?..oh wait, that’s his “eye color”.

  3. Good thing he didn’t try to rob this kid:

…and can’t get the taste out of her mouth

Message to all you youngsters out there: Older people are much stronger than you think. No joke.

The only thing that can stop a Florida Man with a knife, is a Florida Woman with her gums.

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