You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that’s in the side that’s in goes out, and when he’s out he comes in and the next man goes in until he’s out. When they are all out, the side that’s out comes in and the side that’s been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have been out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game.
Test cricket is best “watched” via a radio in the background while you’re working in the shed.
Watching it works while heavily stoned, though. And it’s fun (but not easy) to play while drunk or tripping.
The degree to which you almost described baseball is, frankly, terrifying.
If an umpire gets stoned, is he a reeferee?
I propose a 5 dollar a pack tax, to be put into the general fund.
Oh, this is head injuries? I’m sure they will find a way to make tax revenue of it.
How are the tanning and makeup industries doing? Still haven’t admitted they cause disease?? Soon enough.
Is there any industry that does NOT cause any disease?
I know you aren’t being serious, but association football does have it’s own links to brain diseases.
Head injuries are still a far too common cause of death in football, not as common as heart problems though. Thankfully players aren’t dying from gangrene or tetanus after injuries anymore.
These are well-known.
I didn’t claim playing doesn’t cause brain damage.
I claimed that watching can have detrimental effects too. 
Yes,
But I have no idea what causes someone to expand someone elese’s honest questions into black and white statements by adding terms like any, and then walking away smugly, other than staring the truth in the face and closing your eyes.
I think your response was fallcious, or maybe an invitation to fallacy.
At any rate, if you have a serious answer, I’d love to hear it.
That sounds like what someone who rejects the warm solidarity of the community in favor of social disconnection and/or covert support for the Away Tribe would say… How can you trust someone who doesn’t have affective bonds with the same totemic entities that you do?
Nicely put!
(Except that my support for and affective bonds with the Away Tribes is anything but covert.)
The way I actually tend to explain cricket to Americans is to list the rules changes that would be required to turn baseball into cricket, which are surprisingly few.
I rarely have to do the reverse, as British people tend to be familiar with rounders- a game very similar to baseball, except there’s an extra base and it’s played with a much smaller bat held in one hand, which is considered to be a game for children and mainly for girls.
Ha. Nice dig.
Normally even as a sportsball fan I’m happy with critcism of its essential pointlessness.
But since my home town soccerists look like they might achieve something remarkable this year I’m kind of enjoying it.
It’s still not cricket, though. Best. Sport. Ever (proper cricket, that is, not the silly thing going on in India right now).
But daneel Jr. is never playing American Football, ever. Or rugby, for that matter.
awesome. Back when I was a kid I had a camp counselor who’d come over from Ireland who taught us cricket, inasmuch as it can be taught in an afternoon to easily distracted 4th / 5th graders. Sorry to say I’ve completely forgotten it but vaguely remember thinking it was a lot harder than baseball because of how the ball could bounce on the pitch.
Hey, my dad used to work on datacenter UPS systems in Redmond, and there were always guys out on the quad playing cricket. They seemed to enjoy it a lot.
Try Australian Rules football; you get the occasional snapped spine, but head injuries are rare…
Lost it at “now in Latin!”.
Took a while for me to remember where I knew Ms. Micucci’s face from.
On a related note, can I digress every topic into including Key and Peele somehow? Yes, apparently.
