Normal people eat chocolate bunnies ears-first


Rule 35

Careful though - go to far and you destroy the next generation.

Military professionals hit the one at the back, then the one at the front. That way the other three are trapped and can’t escape the ambush.



That really only works for Sgt York peppermint patties.


I’m not a chocolagobiologist, but from what I’ve seen, there’s an excess
of chocolate bunny population, if anything.

By eating the eggs before they can hatch, I’m performing a public service.


Wait, so it’s weird to eat the chocolate bunny’s gall bladder first? (Asking for a friend.)


You have to eat the organs too or suffer rabbit starvation.


The first thing I do is bite off their rear paws. Then, I bite off their front paws. Next, I bite off their nose. Followed by licking out their right eye and then their left eye. The ears I leave. So that every shriek of every child that weeps at their sight, every woman who cries out “Dear god, what is that thing!” shall be theirs to keep forever, in those perfect, chocolate ears…

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So what does it mean when shout “stop staring at me!” and bite the chocolate bunny eyes out?


"Say what?!"


I sting and paralyze the bunny then drag the specimen to a specially prepared brooding nest, where I lay a single egg on the bunny’s abdomen, and cover the entrance. When my larva hatches, it creates a small hole in the abdomen, then enters and feeds voraciously, avoiding vital organs for as long as possible to keep the chocolate bunny alive. After several weeks, my larva pupates. Finally, my baby becomes an adult and emerges from the bunny’s abdomen to continue the life cycle.

Isn’t that wonderful? :smiley:



Face! I bite them in the Face!

But seriously, the best part of a bunny is the liver. I used to mix it in with wild rice and serve it with the rest of the bunny. Now since I’ve got more time on my hands, anymore, I do other, crazier stuff.


Good choice. Healthier.



I used the eat the eyes and nothing else…
I never really cared for milk chocolate and I would usually get a milk chocolate bun that had candy (sugar) eyes…

(sometimes there would be a bonus candy carrot)
Luckily, sometime in the 70’s they started making dark chocolate buns – usually no candy eyes, but nom nom nom!


Unless it’s small enough to eat in one go, it makes sense to leave the flat base intact so it will still stand on the table without rolling around, right?


The last thing I eat is the face and eye, so the bunny could witness every chomp of its hideous dissolution.

Other than that I’m a pretty nice guy.


When bunnies eat chocolate humans, where do they bite first?


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A side of candy fava beans, perhaps?

(I see a business opportunity here…)