Normal people eat chocolate bunnies ears-first


Originally published at:

Eating people will not give you the nutrition you need

B Kliban had an out-scale impact on my view of the world.

Cooking (not just dinner)

I always eat my chocolate ducks bill-first.


And he gives me a chocolate Easter bunny. And this shows how tricky those guys are. I eat the chocolate and I think, wait a second… this isn’t around Easter.
"Was this a test?"
He said, “Yes.”
"And what does it mean?"
He said, "Well, had you eaten the ears first you would have been normal; had you eaten the feet first you would have had an inferiority complex; had you eaten the tail first you would have had latent homosexual tendencies; and had you eaten the breasts first you would have had a latent oedipal complex."
I said, "Well, go on. What does it mean when you bite out the eyes and scream, ‘Stop staring at me!’?’"
He says, "It shows you’ve a tendency towards self-destruction."
I said, "What do you recommend?"
He says, “Go for it!”


As with all vaguely anthropomorphised candy, “feet first” is the pro choice.

How else are you going to stop it running away?




And if one computes a random starting point for eating, knowing full well that it did not represent a real rabbit? Some people would probably say that one is antisocial for disregarding others’ neurotic conventions.




It’s not disregard, I just prefer to socialize at well adjusted conventions.



You people are all weird.

You’re supposed to eat the bunny’s eggs first.


The study fails to mention rabbits left unharmed due to being made from rather awful chocolate.


I pick-off the one at the back.


I like to eat them slowly from the bottom up, so I can hear the screams until the last delicious bite. Dark chocolate only, please.


Well, duh.

It’s just too bad that it’s hard to find the big, solid bunnies in dark.




Honestly, it’s not about social conventions. Not starting from a nice pointy bit that fits in your mouth is kind of like my two-year-old eating a piece of bread. The question isn’t whether she starts from a corner or an edge, she starts from the flat of the bread, just trying to… mush it in there, despite her nose being in the way.


I clicked through from RSS just to post this… ninja’d.


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