As you yourself say, for that to be the case in an age of single-slice, tine-loading forks, there would have to be a considerable number of people involved. The hazards of such a crowd, everyone jostling for a space at the hearth, toasting in all directions indiscriminately, should be obvious — it’s all butter and jam until someone loses an eye. The founders were clearly aware of the dangers, which is why they specifically called for a well-regulated kitchen staff.
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Which neatly brings me back to my very much earlier point. They deliberately removed the
line at the drafting stage, leaving it to states to determine, but mandated the well-regulated kitchen staff as a backstop.
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Then you are totally missing out on the NTA’s many benefits, including toaster safety classes, lessons in advanced buttering techniques, and special discounts on toaster shows and conventions. Toasting keeps bread populations at a healthy, ecologically sound balance. Whether you take your toast with tea, coffee, or bourbon and Kentucky branch water, toasting is an American tradition, and the NTA is there to preserve it.
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This is of course where your otherwise entirely accurate history lesson goes off track.
A British squaddie will happily go hungry and without sleep or other comfort - but don’t dare touch their brew.
Most of the British colonial troops were of course Germans (as instanced in the excellent Burton historical epic “Sleepy Hollow” and therefore not great tea drinkers but insistent on their Toastbrot which was incredibly fashionable at the time, having been first introduced to Germany by King George of Hannover after he became King of England as well.
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You mean PROOF it. 
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Ah yes. I stand corrected. But they all wore red tunics. To signify the embers with which the bread is toasted and the kettle kept warm.
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Maybe it depends which side of the pond. I’ve heard both used, quite commonly.
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Yes, it’s a recurring entity in the Thursday Next books, which I give the highest possible recommendation because of exactly this sort of thing.
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I did read a couple or so of Jasper Ffordes a very long time ago - and had totally forgotten about the TMB. Must go back to them.
And in contradiction to Father Ted: “Up with this sort of thing”, say I.
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Ummmmmm
And the DNC just put up the most diverse group of candidates and the most female candidates from the top of the ballot to the bottom in history. And won. So it’s even more extreme come January.
The fact that there were like 2 pausible Hispanic candidates and one out of his skull black guy in the GOP primary for 2016 is an artifact of 2 things.
The since abandoned Bush II era attempt to appeal to Hispanics. And the fact that the Republican party thinks one of the most important things involved in earning minority votes and dodging racism charges is checking off boxes by psuhing their handful of minorities to prominent positions. Rather than having policies that that will attract these groups or even acknowledging their priorities.
The DNC actually elected a black president and their last candidate was a woman (while her primary challenger was Jewish). The GOP points at their two Cubans and Herman Cain ( who may very well be a space alien). And says But we’ve got a black guy! Vote Trump!
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Funny, I’d always thought it was “Hail Hydra!”
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It’s Heil something or other. Can’t quite remember what though.
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Ooh, you’re a rye one, you are!
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And I know how to millet, too! 
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Seems you spelled “hate” as “fear”
Easy to mix up.
Me too! They are an excellent series.
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And perhaps to bring the thread to a close…
And then there’s this: Toast Ale
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I’m counting this thread as anecdotal evidence that toast wards off gun nuts like garlic wards off vampires.
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Yes, but only if it is hot enough to melt butter. Cold toast won’t do it. (Open) Carry your toaster at all times.
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