Originally published at: Opus Dei masturbation gloves | Boing Boing
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‘…extreme abrasiveness’ won’t stop everyone. Some folks are into some weird stuff.
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Opus Dei folks are a hearty bunch, kinda kinky too.
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I do hope you will update the Holiday Gift list…
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“I’ve tried everything, what else ya got?”
“We got these, the street name is ‘vice grips’.”
“Ohhhhh. . . It’ll be like being 13 again!”
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Somewhere in the Vactican someone is wondering “why didn’t anyone think of this before?” It would be a new spin on an old device.
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I think I would want my gloves a bit longer if I needed these to clean sewers.
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Considering all the Victorian era anti-masturbation devices, I’d think someone did think of this before, even if perhaps not the exact Amazon version linked to. But I’m hesitant to Google the topic specifically in search of gloves from that time… 
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It looks like they already just got used to scour the rice cooker. The real challenge is resisting licking your fingers.
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You’ll get some interesting Amazon recommendations for sure.
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Rob Beschizza is a poet. 
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damn BB is getting thirsty for affiliate revenue
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TFH when you stop in for a sesame bagel and all they have left is everything. 
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I prefer these, because the brand name “Ridgid” just does something for me. . .
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I want a full review and short story in Mark’s Useful Stuff column, with its recent, vaguely chthonic turn.
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It goes back a lot further than Victorians. Blame Augustine of Hippo for the invention of “Orginal Sin”.
You could also blame Paul of Tarsus if you like, he had some weird ideas about women I think.
Don’t blame Jesus though. He didn’t really care much about Gentiles.
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Those look like amazing ball scratch gloves.
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VERN L. BULLOUGH’S paper TECHNOLOGY FOR THE PREVENTION OF “LES MALADIES PRODUITES PAR LA MASTURBATION” might be worth a read.
Only one glove patent (973,330) is mentioned, and arguably its purpose isn’t so specialized.
“The objects of my improvement are to provide a means protecting the hands of an insane person so as to prevent their use of the hands to do injury to their own person or to property thereby.”
PS Kellogg was a fucking sadist with a penchant for genital mutilation.
This is also on scihub
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