Do you really think that was the point/her distraction?
Sorry, but I also look at this story trough my worldview, I don’t expect that’s the case. I think it was only the colour difference.
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It did strike me as a bit odd that she didn’t notice he had albinism, actually. It doesn’t just look like “really pale skin”; it’s pretty evidently different. So even if he and the child’s mother grew up next door to each other in the same ethnically homogeneous town, they’d still have different skin tones.
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If there are couples of any sex that want little to nothing to do with the other sex, they are free to ask for the right to care for children, but they should expect to be denied.
Gay prospective parents need only demonstrate the same things any other prospective parenting couple must, where it is allowed. Where it isn’t allowed they need to challenge the law.
Relate the gender bias, if present and stated or demonstrated, to any other qualifier on the list of reasons you shouldn’t consider. If a white couple stated they would be raising their child exclusively among white people and intended to themselves and teach their children to shun other people, the adoption agency should refuse. Likewise with any of the rest, sexual orientation, national origin, even religion. There’d be nothing wrong with a couple acknowledging they would be raising a child Catholic, but tell an agency that the child would only be allowed the company of Catholics and an agency is going to realize they’ve got a couple without the child’s best interests at heart by the standards of an inclusive society.
TLDR, if you a hater, be sure not to tell the adoption agency. Parenting/adoption probably isn’t a workable analogy for whether it’s a feminist issue or not.
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In general, I’d agree about profiling, but let’s face it, it’s about power. If the profiling is directed towards the those with real power like me, then I think it’s my responsibility not to play the victim card when there are real victims all about.
As a straight, white, male, I’m playing life on easy mode (which is good for me, because even easy mode can occasionally be pretty challenging), so I feel it behooves me to be able to accept without whining the incredibly rare case where these attributes don’t work to my advantage. The dice are massively loaded in my favour - if they don’t roll 7 every time, that’s not cause for complaint.
However, I take your point, profiling in general targets the the most powerless, so it should probably be discouraged in general. It’s when I’m the target I can’t get too upset.
A MUCH better ending to many recent stories involving police interaction in the US;
bravo to the cop for actually acting like a conscientious civil servant.
I can only thumbs up your story and add more worry to the mix. My experience and concentration is on special needs people–often those that are unable to speak for themselves due to whatever the reason. Add that to the growing trend, immigrants that barely speak the language. Whenever it’s the nanny that is trying best to resolve the situation or the client’s parent trying to understand what’s going on. The poor communication due to language just worsen situation. Yes, I’m aware of translation services, but that takes time.
The only solution is to carry identification papers and contact information, which not only limited to parent/guardian, but school(s), nanny companies, social worker(s), lawyers etc,.
The other maybe solution is perhaps if your community of foster families come together form a more formal group and then invite a police liaison to discuss matters of concern like this story. And this formal group could also explore other matters like pharmacy, emergency preparedness, financial well being, etc,. I am part of a group of parents of special needs kids, we meet periodically. Our last topic was of great concern for most people of the group, the concern of aging parents and their now adult special needs child.
I’m not a parent of one, btw. Just a family member.
Good to have foster parent represent here, whenever LGBT or not. I guess I’ll do my duty for those special needs kids.
Fair enough. But oppression isn’t an Olympic sport. Our privilege comes with commensurate influence and responsibility. When we don’t complain, it doesn’t help fellow victims who are at a greater disadvantage than us. On the contrary. It’s an exercise of our privilege to be able to let it roll off our shoulders. We have an ethical duty to speak out against bigotry. I suggest that the real test is the manner in which we do so, to remind the world that we are all in this together and that those injustices against us are but a taste of the injustices against those without the privileges afforded us. Don’t stand aside; stand behind our fellow humans.
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they make better shields when they are in front of you… 
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Wasn’t there a video game that actually did this - made playing a female instead of a male character much harder? I think I remember reading something like that, but can’t recall the context or the title.
I’m white and usually present as male, especially in public. I’ve seen more pointed stares and found more hostility when I’ve been out with a black woman than I have when out with a white man. (Point of reference: Chicago area.)
Even there, though, most such couples portrayed are gay, rarely lesbian and I don’t think I’ve ever seen a transgender couple in pop culture (though my knowledge is hardly exhaustive).
I agree that this is likely the case, although I do have to say that it may not be quite as easy to tell based on appearance. One of my partners and I are both nonbinary (Enby), but if you saw us out together (or in the media), most likely you’d assume we were each binary gendered and heterosexual. This isn’t to say I wouldn’t like to see more obviously nonbinary people on television in any capacity, but for some of us, it’s not exactly obvious.
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Point taken. I mainly meant that characters that are in some way portrayed as trans (if not through appearance then through exposition, dialogue other storytelling mechanisms) are considerably less common than say humans with fictional superpowers. I hear what you’re saying about it not being obvious. I guess I just want these dimensions of humanity to have some inclusion in the pop culture narrative because storytelling, in whatever media, is often where societies begin to accept the people with whom they previously have trouble empathizing.
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Absolutely. I’ve noted that being portrayed inaccurately (or even insultingly) is actually preferable to not being portrayed at all. (The message there is that you don’t even exist as something villainous.) While I’d love to see more NBs like my sweetie or me, I also know that this is only because we’re part of a range of the picture, and that only showing people that can be mistaken (e.g., passing) for one of the binary gender states is bad representation.
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I don’t know, but I was referring to John Scalzi’s iconic piece Straight White Male: The Lowest Difficulty Setting There Is
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Ah yes. I remember reading that piece, and maybe in my mind it became an actual game. It probably should be.
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