There’s an argument here somewhere, you should take some time and think it through , try to poke holes in the argument and if it sill holds, come back and expound on it.
These are bones you’re pickin’, no meat to these arguments:
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No one called you stupid. No one ridiculed you, made fun of, or demeaned you. This is not a circle jerk, but a discussion. If you don’t like this discussion, you are welcome to say so, and leave the thread. There are many other threads on the BBS that might be more worth your time, if you don’t like this one. No one is asking you to agree with all we say, but to be respectful.
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No, you are being rude.
And you chose to come into this particular thread and post multiple times about how the female and male “guys” are acting like racist dickwads in a circle-jerk, and they won’t listen to you.
And every time somebody says you’re being rude, you respond with the equivalent of “NUH-UH YOU’RE BEING RUDE, JERK!”
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All (cisgendered) men DO have certain social advantages over non-men*, regardless of whether we asked for them or choose to acknowledge them. Like any form of privilege it does not mean that all people who have these advantages are better off than all people who don’t.
*Excluding the island nation of Themyscira
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@singletona082: Do you ever actually discuss things with people online, or do you just lob opinions out until you feel that you have sufficiently “won”?
Why do you think this is a good and effective form of communication? Or do you just not care what anyone else thinks online, for they are beneath you.
Have you ever expressed curiosity at why people think things? Or does that get in the way of showing those fussy tumblrinas who is boss?
What about other whitecismales? Are they gender traitors? Do they not know biotruth?
Why do you, personally, think that they may disagree with you about the framing of these discussions?
Please do not take any sarcasm there as a sign that I am not interested in your perspective.
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Right.
Because i totally insinuated ‘ALL WOMEN ARE-’ I simply stated this thread looks like something a bunch of closed minded tumblrites would pull. Not something I’d see on boingboing.
So Yea, especially that comic. That’s kindof a straight up middle finger ‘we don’t want you to speak sit the fuck down’ to me.
Oh I do believe I’ve been perfectly clear here. You’re acting like the same subset of assholes you’re pissed off to begin with at the start of the thread.
Because getting shoved around is so very conducive to treating the person doing said shoving respectfully. The initial responses I got were very shove feeling. Admittedly I am a very loud person at times, which isn’t exactly something you want when trying to negotiate. However when the first response is 'oh look here comes dude jumping to the defense at the first sign of the MAN SIGNAL… and you expect me to not feel more than a touch bent out of shape?
Really now? Just… dude. Really you expect me to get slapped in the face and tell me to chill out?
You’re confusin affermitive action with political correctness. I got a partial ride in college because of a disability scholarship. Several of my friends got full rides either off minority scholarships or other aid programs. Several of said friends have gone on to be fairly successful as a result of college. This proves leveling the playing field is inherently a good thing. More than a few of said friends were white and got help because they were poor, which is also good so long as those programs exist since it acknowledges that rich people have a leg up.
However that is not the same as political correctness. Political correctness is just another set of community standards, and as I had stated before, people can use this to be ‘fuck you very polite’ to people they don’t like, and then start clubbing them in the face because they don’t fall in line.
You accuse me of ‘wow you have a poor pity me complex.’ And … just… Look. I just want the whole lot of you to be mindful because, as I said, it looks very much like it could keep funnling in til you don’t recognize you’re doing the same behaviors that you hate. It’s like me and my stepdad. He’s a loud obnoxious abusive dickhead that uses his bulk to bully his way through or to pick on a single detail or mis-spoken word then justifies it after the fact totally going on like it isn’t actually a bigassd baby fit that he isn’t getting his way.
As much as i hate the man and how he acts, I grew up with him and still live in the same house, so like it or not I am liable to be prone to many of the same problems. I say this because as much as you people want to do good, you’re still People, so you’re prone to the same closeminded ‘oh hell it’s not us get rid of it’ mentality.
IE we have to be mindful of ourselves because we’re not perfect.
I don’t like being prone to anger, as this thread demonstrates it complicates things. However at the same time a lot of you also reacted badly. None of us are blameless here.
Would you say you’re disappointed?
And how exactly would you say that this is inaccurate? That it angers you is not evidence of your best intentions in approaching this topic, nor have you attempted to offer nuance beyond the scope of this reductionist caricature.
Try not jumping into an ongoing discussion with fists flailing while assuming that persons’ poor opinions of your ability to express yourself online has anything to do with your maleness.
Well, do you want to be less like him or not? Because he’d be high-fiving you all the way.
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Wow, with the arbitrary name-calling; which is the point when all effective communication comes to a screeching halt and the temptation to resort to acting like irritable 5 year olds on the playground is strong.
I’ll choose to resist it, won’t you join me?
This isn’t about ‘women vs men’, or US vs THEM; although the comment that seems to have triggered your ire wasn’t stated as concisely as it could have been.
This conversation is mainly about people of privilege, and how the failure to recognize the very existence of that privilege leads to conflict with those who are disproportionately underprivileged.
That’s all.
Taking it personally doesn’t help advance the conversation, and neither does lumping everyone on this post together as if we all think exactly alike.
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That comic didn’t call you stupid. So, once again, no one called you stupid, it merely called out a perceived behavior. If you felt it was disrespectful, how about say so and leave it at that. Move on if you don’t agree instead of getting angry about it and taking it out on the other participants.
And yes, we all can get angry and out of hand. However, you came into the comments already angry, because you felt that the problem in modern society is “PC” policing. Just to be clear, I don’t think that pointing out a behavior is the same as calling you stupid.
Since when is “dude” an insult? Again, I didn’t insult you and am working hard to keep my tone respectful. And I don’t think that @chgoliz slapped you in the face at all. Much like you, she’s a regular, well respected member of the community.
So pointing out sexist and racist shit is the real problem here? Really? And of course, this community here has standards set by the people who created the boards and we should work to adhere to them. That actually does include a pretty zero tolerance policy of racist/sexist BS. So you have little to no input (as do any of us) in setting and enforcing those community standards, except in how you deploy flags and engage with fellow readers. That’s up to you, just like it’s up to all of us.
I’m sorry to hear you have to live with this. It sucks and I’m truly sorry. I hope you can get out soon and get some help.
But I don’t feel anyone has tried to bully you, or at the very least I haven’t. I’m sorry if you feel that way. Maybe it might be a good idea to step away for a bit and come back when you’ve cooled down?
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The problem here is that you’re not trying to be better through this bickerfest, and you feel you’re superior to us because you… do not follow social convention and standards of treating others.
You offer no respect and yet demand it?
Persons aren’t mocking you for your disabilities but you’re demanding the ability to mock others for theirs and throwing a fit when people freely let you say whatever you want but judge you appropriately for what you say and how you say it.
I will say that you will feel better about yourself and others when you’re finally moved out and things will make sense, you will loathe yourself and others less. I wish you peace and calm.
You’re not your stepfather and his influence on you will diminish greatly with distance and space to craft yourself in whatever image makes you happiest.
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I’ll say this though, everyone is a bigot; but everyone have the potential to become less bigoted than they already are. The first step of combating bigotry is to acknowledge this philosophy.
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and is “calling out” a good thing, a bad thing, or a neutral cliche?
To be clear, @singletona082 was pissed about a cartoon which I did not post. He clearly sees being called out on his behavior to be a bad thing. I’m attempting to use it in a more neutral fashion. You may disagree. If you think I’m being dickish, please call out my behavior. 
Kudos to you for saying that everyone is bigoted in some way, (which is true) rather than “everyone is racist”; It really irks me when people erroneously make that argument.
Anyone can be a bigot, and anyone can make the endeavor to become less of one, but you’re quite right; the first step is acknowledging it.
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I like say that we are all prejudiced, which is a little more specific. Our brains our wired to learn by patterns so much so we see them all the time when there are not any there. The trick is to work recognize when we are doing this and work past that instead of letting it rule us and it can be hard.
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Absolutely. We are all broken, imperfect beings, as @singletona082 stated.
The issue is when these imperfections escape the lips, and through shame-avoidance, instead of modifying speech for better communication, persons would rather double down and say things to actively troll instead of trying to determine what is actually a legitimately good idea that they’ve thought through.
“Political correctness” is a joke taken terribly seriously (primarily by the political right-wing), what people actually want is a better filter for their own mouths and others. Nuance of what is a good idea and desired is entirely contextual.
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Because misery loves company?
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But are they railing against actual PC or straw man PC?
I find this is pretty true for engineers:
Engineers are not scientists nor are they mathematicians.[4] They are engineers. Every other field of knowledge is interesting insofar as it is useful raw material for engineering. Engineers care about results in the real world, and get these results; other people are observably utterly delusional about technology and probably shouldn’t be allowed near scissors.[5] This breeds a certain arrogance.
The vast majority of engineers are perfectly reasonable and are fans of science and mathematics, even though those fields are not what they do. But respecting science is not always a requirement of the job.
If I was to play devil’s advocate then I would agree that political correctness can feel like putting the cart before the horse. Getting people to speak respectfully does not address people’s actions, which (once again) feels like it should be the point.
From this point of view political correctness can seem like white guilt in action. Ineffective but designed to make people feel good about themselves for talking the talk without actually having to walk the walk.
But these are just some of the mental acrobatics people go through to avoid change and one of the two main reasons to oppose PC is without a doubt to avoid change, even when well intentioned, better the devil you know and all that.
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It started iirc in the 90s as a protest against clunky phrases like saying “differently abled” instead of “disabled”, and has moved on to damn near anything polite that anyone on the left cares about. The implication behind the phrase is that there’s something inherently Communist about being polite, as far as I can tell. They can’t possibly be serious that they think anyone will be dissapeared for using a racial slur.
And just nevermind that the right-wing blogosphere anytime any moderately person on the left says anything the least bit off-color about anyone or anything they consider to be on the right…completely different, so not political correctness.
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