Share your poorly-worded advice (original or referenced) here.
As is customary, I’ll start.
Woke up this morning to find that my post-lights-out, snack-in-bed of Ghiradelli chocolate had been messier than I recalled. (My defense: it was dark, I was hungry, and I had access to chocolate.) Bits of melted chocolate everywhere in the vicinity of my pillow. My first-minute-of-cognizant-consciousness conclusion:
Never get in bed with chocolate.