Powerful writing on miscarriage and the decisions women face when pregnancy goes wrong

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Thanks for continuing to boost knowledge on this important topic. People seem shocked at the high 30% rate of miscarriage but these are the numbers. There’s a huge value to thinking about these issues in advance if you are going to become pregnant so you can make informed decisions if need be in the heat of the moment.

In some ways the writer of this article was in a good position - she had competent medical staff who identified the issue and the time to weigh her options carefully before proceeding. My own story involved a less desirable situation - last January my wife showed what now I identify as clear symptoms (bleeding, cramps) for days yet our clinic refused to even utter the ‘M’ word or give clear indications of the decisions on the table. As the symptoms intensified we were forced to rush into a 9 hour emergency room scenario - not an easy place to carry out such a physically and psychologically debilitating ordeal. Everything turned out OK, we mourned and then recovered; an unassisted miscarriage is a very natural process in it’s own way.

My wife is now pregnant again (14 weeks in, donor egg ivf at age 47!) and while we certainly don’t dwell on the potential of a miscarriage (also very important!), we have a plan and know the options if anything starts heading in the wrong direction.

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Great article–thanks for posting. A couple years ago my wife wrote an article about the stigma of miscarriage and how it makes a tough situation even worse: http://www.babble.com/pregnancy/coping-with-miscarriage-pregnancy-secret/ It’s too bad that it’s so hard to be open about what happened, and also that others often feel unable to respond with kindness.

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