"Pretty unfair," says the man whose wife left him after aliens implanted him with a chip

Originally published at: "Pretty unfair," says the man whose wife left him after aliens implanted him with a chip | Boing Boing


Up here in Joshua Tree we have 100’s of folks that would gladly take up your day with therir many experiences with extraterrestrial aliens, at no cost, till your ears bleed or you fall over from boredom.
Pack snacks and lots of H2o, a pair of ear plugs too.


Can we turn all these insane people into a profit somehow? Sure: the republican party. But we’ll have to breed a whole lot more of them as they tend to drink bleach. uhm… so some sort of church promoting procreation, or… i know, make all forms of birth control illegal! Better ramp up the cost of getting a proper education, conspiracy theories, or remaining anti-science by 37% just to be on the safe side; these Eloi won’t efficiently propagate themselves.


I love how an intergalactic species would use microchips.


You’d think after the first few dozen alien abductions he’d put a camera in his bedroom or something just so he could convince his fellow humans he wasn’t a total nutball.


Same thing out in Marfa, TX. It’s a great place, but it sure draws in some “interesting” folks. Aliens, chemtrails, you name it – they’re talking about it.


giphy-2 3

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Steve also revealed that his urge to investigate the paranormal had led to him losing his job, when he was dismissed after using company equipment to try to analyse the suspected implant.

“Steve, stop digging into your forearm with that utility knife. Why don’t you come to the office?”

I hope he works for NASA and “dismissed after using company equipment” is really code for “shitcanned after he snuck aboard the last ISS supply run.”

This guy’s narrative is not one of some truck driver in the desert ranting about aliens.

For the curious:

LinkedIn profile
His Company’s website


I used to work with a guy who claimed to be the victim of alien abductions, you can even see him on an episode of NOVA and 48 Hours talking about it.

The problem was, he was such an unstable, annoying jackass that even though we kept open minds and politely gave him the benefit of the doubt at first, he eventually made us dismiss his stories.

It was a chicken-and-the-egg problem-- was he a jackass because of the abductions, or were the “abductions” just another manifestation of his jackassery?

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If the anti-vaxxers only knew…


So is the character Richard Schultz on People of Earth based on this guy? I mean, there are similarities here.

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They wouldn’t because they have much better chip fabs than us; they implant liquid crystal nano-nano-chips.

Excuse me, it was a nanochip

I think if it were an intergalactic species, they’d be using nanu-chips.

robin williams vintage GIF


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