That’s the nice part about drinking/drug memes; no unpleasant physical consequences the next day.
I’d rather have a bottle in front me than a frontal lobotomy!
Sure, like Leicester City F.C.
Europe is the home of King James. Cleveland, Ohio is the basketball home of LeBron “King” James.
LeBron 'King" James is the basketball messiah that has come back home and led his Cleveland Cavalier team, located in the city nicknamed “The Land”–to the Promised Land i.e., a NBA Championship.
Lebron “King” James has resurrected Cleveland, Ohio and Northeast Ohio–from the dark, despair and abyss of 52 years of wandering through the desert of major professional sports ineptitude and failure.
Yesterday saw a throng of 20,000 plus “Believers” and “Witnesses” flock like sheep to the airport to welcome home the new reigning NBA Champions, Cleveland Cavaliers. The Cleveland Cavaliers in divine fashion, vanquished the (once considered), invincible and now former defending NBA Champions, Golden State Warriors.
Tomorrow will be a day of sheer elation, exaltation and rapture, as a stunning, spectacular, prophesied and biblical like–multitude of over ONE MILLION “Believers” and “Witnesses” celebrate and watch the NBA Championship Victory Parade, for the Cleveland Cavaliers, led by LeBron “King” James.
Wait a minute! You mean that funny, tall dude from Trainwreck is an NBA player!?!
Wait a minute!
You mean he made a movie. This certainly reveals how much I watch and go to movies.
I’m not a big LeBron James fan, but he did an outstanding job. Hope you watch it sometime.
Leicester City play in King Power Stadium.
True, but I still have no clue what the happy fuck all that’s got to do with “Christian mythology.”
But I’m quickly learning not to expect any logic or sanity in certain threads.
Have another drink with me?
Sure, I’m in!
Lebron? Sure, he led the Cavs to victory, but everyone knows the REAL star of the NBA is with the Warriors…
And in case you missed it… here is some more from the Queen of the NBA:
http://static.celebuzz.com/uploads/2015/06/riley-curry-nba-playoffs-hi-061715.gif
The late Ivan Van Sertima pointed out that, no mummies have ever been found on excavation inside any pyramid, however in some later Kemetic dynasties, people began to associate and consider the pyramids to be of supernatural, divine and religious origin, which may have resulted in some deceased bodies being placed inside some pyramids.
The people of ancient Kemet, 99 9/10 percent of the time, buried their dead in tombs or other selected burial sites, not primarily or most often in pyramids. The following articles have some differences in historical account, however the articles reveal that ancient Kemet was a place (on the African continent), where advanced culture, religion and science could be found.
…Though unintentional mummification, owed mostly to Egypt’s arid and sandy climate, occurred as far back as prehistoric times, it wasn’t until around 2600 B.C. when the Egyptians began to practice mummification as a purposeful and ritualistic process. It was a long and expensive procedure, which is why only kings were mummified in the beginning…
…Religion was a very important part of the mummification process. Because most of those whose remains were mummified were kings and pharaohs, a lot of ceremony and prayer was involved in ensuring the body and spirit were prepared for the afterlife. Priests played roles in every step of the process, including wrapping the mummy with linen strips, placing the internal organs in the specially prepared canopic jars, and blessing the entrance of the mummy’s tomb at the funeral…
http://www.mylearning.org/a-step-by-step-guide-to-egyptian-mummification/p-1681/
The chief embalmer was a priest wearing a mask of Anubis. Anubis was the jackal headed god of the dead. He was closely associated with mummification and embalming, hence why priests wore a mask of Anubis.
This is the step-by-step process* of how mummification took place:
*Insert a hook through a hole near the nose and pull out part of the brain
*Make a cut on the left side of the body near the tummy
*Remove all internal organs
*Let the internal organs dry
*Place the lungs, intestines, stomach and liver inside canopic jars
*Place the heart back inside the body
*Rinse inside of body with wine and spices
*Cover the corpse with natron (salt) for 70 days
*After 40 days stuff the body with linen or sand to give it a more human shape
*After the 70 days wrap the body from head to toe in bandages
*Place in a sarcophagus (a type of box like a coffin)
…There were special religious burial rites that had to be performed by the temple priests at each step of the mummification. This was done to help make sure that the person who had passed away would enter the afterlife properly. There were special oils that were used that were purified by the priests, but were also developed over the years to help preserve the body. Mummies have been discovered that are over 3,000 years old and when they are uncovered some still have hair and skin…
http://www.funcomet.com/for_kids/ancient-egypt-jokes/
Q: Why was the mummy so tense?
A: He was all wound up.
Q: What is a mummy’s favourite type of music?sarcophagus-469273_1920
A: Wrap!
Q: Why did the mummy call the doctor?
A: Because he was coffin.
Q: Why were ancient Egyptian children confused?
A: Because their daddies were mummies!
Q: Why don’t mummies have hobbies?
A: They are too wrapped up in their work.
Q: Why do mummies not tell secrets?
A: They keep everything under wraps.
Q: What was the scarab’s favourite pop group?
A: The Beetles!
Q: Where do mummies go for a swim?
A: To the Dead Sea
I repeat again: Djedkare Isesi.
Mungu ni mkubwa
You mean–dini ni bandia!
A Boing Boing Sort of Religious Joke
Jesus and Satan are having a competition on who can finish an essay first. 1, 2, 3, GO. Jesus starts and takes his time while Satan is typing up a storm. Satan is typing so fast that the power goes out and both computers are shut off. They start back up, and Jesus states that he is done with the essay. Riddled, Satan asks how he wrote that fast. Jesus turns to him and simply says, “Jesus saves.”