Raccoons have the most appalling table manners

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That’s me after a handle of whiskey drinking. REALLY!

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Some folks love Reese’s Puffs more than others

Give them a break they are just babies. Adult raccoons have impeccable manners, especially older boars.

That’s me from the ages of about ten to fifteen, when my mother was regularly heard saying, “How many goddamn gallons of milk a week do I have to buy?”

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Yeah, the little bastards are cute until you see what they can do to a dog or cat, or find the remains of a litter of kittens they have eaten alive.

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You apparently haven’t seen any that got their little paws on chocolate covered espresso beans.

Wonderful. Feeding varmints.

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It must depend on the neighborhood. My local raccoons are 4-legged trailer trash; nice enough personalities, but total slobs.

If there is such a thing as raccoon racism … is there a word for that?

I hope he’s not setting out the kibble milk for them, or he’s likely to have a crawlspace full of raccoon diarrhea to look forward to. Not sure what that meal would be suitable for, come to think of it… Oh, I know!

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