Originally published at: Rats given tiny backpacks and microphones and sent to rescue people trapped in earthquake rubble | Boing Boing
…
They only need some little Tupperware containers with slices of pizza, like St. Bernard dogs and their casks of brandy.
“Here I am trapped in a collapsed building; how can this possible get any worse?.. RATS! RATS! RAAAATS!!!”
Cool! I’m pretty sure those are African Giant rats, which are already heroes for being trained to locate mines in minefields without being heavy enough to set them off.
Yes. Better if they are trained to speak.
“Everybody remain calm. I am Ratso, king of the underworld, and you will do everything I say.”
Oh look they have microphones……RATS DOING KARAOKE!!!
“I thought I was doing okay after having a building fall on me, but clearly I’m in worse shape than I realized - I’m hallucinating rats wearing little backpacks… Oh god, now it’s talking to me!”
“Sir! Do you require medical attention??”
the brandy barrels seen around the necks of Saint Bernards was the invention of the artist, Edwin Landseer, who, as a 17-year-old in 1820, painted, “Alpine Mastiffs Reanimating a Distressed Traveler.”
The kids are alright.
Underage drinking. Outrageous.
Well you have to remember that back in 1820 the legal drinking age was six and you could get a rental car from Hertz by age eight.
I wonder if that kid made up any other myths to mess with people. “As you can clearly see from this documentary painting I made, shipwreck survivors found off the coast of Bora Bora are frequently rescued by dolphins bearing daiquiris and hookers.”
Edwin Landseer, originator of the Sexy Mermaid myth.
If I were caught in a miserable situation, I think having a friendly rat say hello would be at least cheering.
And they can help get rid of the remains.
Finally, we have redefined Ratpack.
Yup, because if the rubble didn’t kill me, seeing those rescue rats probably would! Watched too much of this as a kid:
Yeah, I know. I just didn’t want to be the “Well, actually…” guy in this thread.