Scientology's $5,000 E-meters are surprisingly well-engineered

It’s very well designed if we assume its purpose is to cost $5,000

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Depending on the use, I might do both: solder the connections after crimping them. That would ensure an guaranteed electrical connection. (at least from my basic knowledge of electrical connectivity; there might be some shenanigans regarding ampacity or frequencies running around in there.)

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It’s infinitely over-engineered, since what is does is nothing.

I think to say that this is “surprisingly well-engineered” is ridiculous, because there has to be a legitimate problem or function that the engineering is supposed to solve or do. I can’t think of anything a small skin galvanometer like that is supposed to do.

OTOH, if the function is “to extract money from clods,” then I suppose the engineering is excellent – but that would apply to the crude early meters too.

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Engineers who are concerned about reliability know that crimped connections are better than soldered crimped connections. The solder wicks up into the wire, causing it to be stiff where it needs flexibility so that it won’t break off when flexed. If the crimp isn’t good enough to be reliable on its own, then you need a better crimper and/or technique, not solder.

That’s not an issue with these stationary meter terminals, but it’s the principle of the thing. After all, we’re discussing the quality of the engineering in this device.

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Point conceded, good sir! Thank you for the education.

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Here’s the patent for the Mark 7 with circuit:

http://www.freepatentsonline.com/6011992.pdf

The patent for the Mark 8 is incomplete. It doesn’t include the real-time clock which locks up the unit if it doesn’t get its yearly “update” via PC software from the mothership. (Really, it checks to see if the registered user is still a Scientologist in good standing.)

In the fine print of the contract, you don’t really buy the e-meter, but license it from Scientology. (They’re always leading edge in shitty technology law.)

Fun fact: They brag about the accuracy and precision of the meter, but the DAC to the meter is only 12 bits. (0-4095)

https://tonyortega.org/2013/12/04/scientologys-shiny-new-ultra-mark-viii-e-meter/

bOkB4

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It must be special. I see all sorts of jiggly stuff around the lines and other high contrast details. Must be theta rays or something emanating from the image.

:hushed:

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They do say that if you want to make money, you’ve got to spend money.

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I think the trim pots are there for theatrical value. If it appears to be a one size fits all gadget, there’s much less snake oil to sell.

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I presume we’re now being monitored by a space lizard for commenting here right?

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Elron’s Basilisk.

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Or a Van de Graff generator to demonstrate the thetans working.

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“It’s alive… alive!!”

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Presumably the almost complete lack of SMDs indicates hand-manufacture by well-paid, skilled elves. It would help explain why these devices are so expensive.

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This is close to the actual name of the patent. I believe it’s: “Device for measuring the resistance of a living body.” There was a falling out with the e-meter inventor and Scientology became so paranoid about losing the patent that they filed and maintain individual patents and trademarks in every country with a patent office - even though most nations simply honor US patents as valid protection on their own soil.

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Well engineered maybe, but i doubt those leads are CAT3.

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The FBI has an art gallery?

Because frozen ants glued to paper, and then sold to the gov’t, fits my definition of ART.

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Sexy. But, does it work? Have you yourself been able to detect space faeries with it? I won’t pay that kinda money if it doesn’t at least detect Space Fairy Trace elements (SFTE’s for short obviously)

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I have that model that I picked up from a collectable store for $40. They didn’t know what it was and had a card on it that said “lie detector”. It’s a very speccy piece of gear for something that does essentially nothing.
The other thing that struck me is it came in a Zero Halliburton case, which is a pretty expensive way to carry it around.
And, yes, once you open it it’s obvious that these are hand-made.

And, no, the instructions make little sense, being composed of incomprehensible Scientology-speak.

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By the way, every good Scientologist is supposed to buy the Mark VIII (two of them, really), and turn in their Mark VII—even if they own their Mark VIIs free and clear.

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