Some Welsh people want a dragon penis on their flag

Originally published at: Some Welsh people want a dragon penis on their flag | Boing Boing


Why does it have to be a male dragon?


Rugby players?

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Lizards have two peniseses.


It doesn’t, just one with an erect penis.

But since you appear to want to knowI did look but can’t find any vulva in (recent) European heraldry although the prehistoric people seemed to have liked them.

Historically naked female breasts in heraldry denoted honesty and openness or in te case of the family of Dodge feeding (srsly!) . Mermaids were also usually depicted without their tops on, shell-bras were a Disney invention :slight_smile:


Now we are into thorny territory. Setting aside the trivial argument that ‘dragons don’t exist’, because birds don’t have a penis.

So now we have to decide if dragons (which I must point out again, don’t exist) are more closely related to lizards or birds.

Since birds are essentially dinosaurs, the upright legs under the body stance of the dragon (still very much not existing) rather than the splayed posture of a lizard (which I am happy to say are real) shows that it shares the same hip as a dinosaur and is therefore not a lizard - which it wasn’t anyway because it doesn’t exist.

So the depiction of the dragon on the coin is probably wrong; unless of course someone has dug up a petrified dragon dong (and there is no way I am Googling that on company time) and shown that they did have penises; in which case this argument is moot - apart from the whole not existing angle of things.


The public petition committee really likes commas. Commas and penises(-ii/-opodes).


But dragons have four feet and wings. So perhaps not birds.

Best to just average the number of penis eses?


Whatever do cars have to do with this?


As far as I’m aware there is no heraldic basis whatsoever for this. I can’t find any reference to wangs in Brooke-Little’s Heraldic Alphabet, and I’ve never seen arms featuring an animal with a dong as either a device or a supporter.

If this gentleman wanted to change it from a dragon passant to a dragon rampant, he might be onto something, but my guess is he just has some deeply sublimated dick issues which I as a Welsh person have no desire to be involved with.


Let me help you with that :smiley:

No joking either, the rampant lions of Holland and Brabant for example were always depicted with an erect member. More modern versions are a bit more modest about it but it is always there…


Some birds have penises. For example the ostrich, the emu, and water fowl. Not only that, “The lake duck holds the Guinness World Record for having the largest avian reproductive organ, from a specimen in Córdoba, Argentina that had a penis measuring 42.5 centimetres (16.7 in). It also has the longest penis any vertebrate in relation to body length.”


Perhaps the erect penis should be in her mouth?
Being eaten obviously, you filthy minded people you.

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How is that blazoned?

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The rampant dick really should be the Q rally flag.


Hmmm we are now into the knotty territory where heraldry, palaeontology - and quite possibly sexual reconstructive surgery - all meet.


It isn’t mentioned in the blazons I checked but just google it, most lions in heraldry are shown with a clearly visible erect penis. Even the examples on Wikipedia.

Here is a good one of Luxembourg on a normal border sign…


So they feel that their flag has been symbolically cast… in a bad light?

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My understand was that, in less prudish times, lions and other heraldic beasts would be not only armed (clawed) and langued (tongued) in a particular tincture, but also pizzled.


Ah! In which case we have a possible solution to this knotty theological problem!

It can have a penis, so long as the proud nation of Wales is prepared to admit that its magnificent flag shows a duck.

Problem solved! I knew we could fix it here on BoingBoing. Next - global warming - is that a duck?