Too bad about the gastro problems with the bars. But I’m baffled by the hostility of the original article – it sounds like it’s championing a cause of some kind. But what the cause is I’m not sure. Like, what’s the goal? The abolition of Soylent? On account of Beschizza personally doesn’t like to drink it?
As for me, I’ve used the powdered- and liquid-form Soylent for months now. (As well as the Coffiest – another brilliant moniker.) No side effects at all. Helpful for calorie watching, reducing junk food cravings, convenience, etc. Liquid Soylent, diluted with a little water, tastes like milk. This is a problem? (Answer: no, it’s not.)
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These are superior to MRE’s in terms of caloric to volume and price, and there therefore superior for true emergency kits or if space and mobility are issues. As far as I know they are the highest density calorie food available.
But if you have unlimited space and money then MRE’s are good, or nearly any well reviewed modern camping meal.
My review of them wasn’t a negative review overall, but it did present certain claims I felt were untrue.
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If that were the case nobody would eat junk food. Most people who eat soylent use it to replace unhealthy fast food meals. It is definitely not as healthy as the ideal meal. But most meals in america are far from ideal. Soylent is better than those.
You aren’t required to go “all in.” According to their PR material more than 80% of their customers only replace one or two meals a day. How many people here skip breakfast? Soylent is better than a skipped meal and its better than taco bell or mcdonalds.
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Denser than lard?
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While I wouldn’t call lard a food, I did look in to some kind of preserved pork belly type product and traditional preserved traveling meats. As a survival product it does not exist, but from what I recall the calories in that were not dissimilar to those in the lemon bars.
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It’s really out of fashion these days since the British Lard Marketing Board and the Lard Information Council closed up.
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Regular MREs would take up more space. MRE’s have a variable shelf life. And the older versions were longer lived. I think the base line is 5 years at 50F, and they can be as low as 1 month at 120f
So they’re typically something you want to replace on the regular.
I’ve got absolutely no idea about the shelf life of soylent products. And I’m not sure its a good idea to rely on them as an emergency food source. So far as I’m aware its not (especially the bars and pre-mixed liquid) designed for long term storage. And a lot of medical professionals have warned against relying it on it as the bulk of your diet. Apparently subsisting on a liquid diet isn’t a good idea, and the potential for nutritional deficiencies is massive if the missed something. Which they likely did. Its supposed to be supplemental food, like slim fast for geeks. The powder would be the best bet. And it apparently doesn’t suffer from the shittening.
The MRE’s are first, actual food. Second designed to provide ~5000 calories per day on three meals. So they can be streatched significantly. They’re actually tested and practically used as a sole food source for various periods of time. They’ve got a lot of salt, and will clog up the pipes. BUT you can’t (normally) buy the military ones. The civilian versions come with lower calorie counts, and often shorter shelf lives.
The actually recommended by experts in this subject thing to go for is canned goods, regular shelf stable stuff (say pasta) and dehydrated foods. Just don’t bother with anything marketed for survivalists or bunkers. Almost all of it is apparently pretty disgusting, and its often got inflated shelf life and seriously lacks for nutrition. Those things are mostly a scam. Sold on the understanding that noones ever actually going to have to eat it. Regular canned goods, and dehydrated foods for camping would be the thing. Though you can get Military MREs on eBay, and their are civilian versions from the same manufacturers that probably have the same shelf life if you want something on top of that.
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Seriously, I had a friend who was an engineer who was really annoyed that there was no “Purina Human Chow” equivalent, so that he could just nosh on some sort of ready-to-eat kibble whenever he felt like it, never have to prepare food, and always have a reasonably balanced diet.
He would have loved Soylent.
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You mean bacon? Smoked dry cured bacon is shelf stable for years to decades if left in a solid slab. As are dry cured hams.
also:
both are delicious.
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I don’t care for the authentic stuff and it’s expensive. Also not really more calorically dense than the survival bars.
Also not ideal for emergency long-term storage. For the caloric and utility you get from pemmican I’d just get a dry cured salami of some sort.
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Properly packaged cured meats end up being way more expensive for the calories and you only gain flavor. That was a factor on my list but not near the top.
My roommate doesn’t really eat. He’ll have a plate of nuts, fruit, and cheese once a day, and then a couple kale/yogurt/fruit/protein powder smoothies.
I have been known to cook meals that require 5 different forks. It’s been a bit of an adjustment.
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They’re quite easy and cost effective to make yourself. Dry cured and hung bacon in particular. The added expense for good charcuterie/salumi is largely down to the labor, time, and skill in making it. You cut that all out when you pick up some wholesale/bulk meats and do the work yourself. Can even be done in a small apartment.
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These bars are incredibly cheap and efficient and packaged in an environment I can’t confidently replicate for cleanliness.
Nobody needs to sell me on eating cured meats, but are you arguing that meat curing as a lifestyle is a better choice for making a three day to one week survival kit? Is this a lifestyle you adhere to? Please tell me the nation of origin for the salami in your disaster preparedness kit.
Me too 
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Nah just that generally for long term food storage shit like cured meats are a better choice. Hell you can keep un-refrigerated apples fresh for a couple years if you do it right.
For portability/emergency kits they may make sense. But again medical professionals have warned against subsisting on them for long. And I’ve just checked their website. They claim after one year of manufacture the vitamins start to break down. Make no other claim about specific shelf life and the bars are printed with an expiration date. Depending on how “fresh” the bars are when you get them you may find yourself replacing them frequently. And They don’t strike as something properly packaged for long storage. Basically you don’t know what’s going to happen to them when they sit for 6 months or more. So its unreliable as an emergency food source, and replacement increases cost.
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Another happy Soylent consumer here; In my opinion, it makes a much better “convenience” breakfast during mornings where I am on-the-go (where convenience is anything more work than a bowl of cereal, and inconvenience is something on the order of a couple scrambled eggs, or a proper smoothie).
I’ll occasionally have some for lunch, but usually I just rock leftovers from all the awesome dinners I cook. I also like it on days where I exercise during lunch, since it frees up more time for me to do my thang.
ETA: powder > bottles. No clue about the bars, and I am too good at making great coffee quickly to try coffiest.
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Soylent, makers of ironic yet humorless meal-replacement slime and snack bars,
I cannot for the life of me imagine a more apt and amusing description. This is brilliant.
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Plain old meal replacement shake is 1/3 the price. Organic chi chi one is 1/2.
Not seeing the value to the brand.
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