Survey: which soul-destroying cursed/enchanted item would you choose?

I’m with you, there. I’ve heard too many tales of Faustian deals with the devil (or his minions) gone wrong to ever entertain such an offer in the first place.

Reminds me of an old school Andy Panda cartoon along those lines:

:musical_note:

πš†πš‘πšŽπš— πšπšŽπš–πš™πšπšŠπšπš’πš˜πš— πšŒπš˜πš–πšŽπšœ πšŠπš›πš˜πšžπš—πš,

π™³πš˜πš—β€™πš πš•πš’πšœπšπšŽπš— 𝚝𝚘 πšπš‘πšŽ πšπšŽπšŸπš’πš• πš’πš— πšπš‘πšŽ πš πš‘πš’πšπšŽ πš—πš’πšπš‘πš πšπš˜πš πš—

π™³πš˜πš—β€™πšπšŒπš‘πšŠ πš•πš’πšœπšπšŽπš— 𝚝𝚘 πšπš‘πšŠπš πšπšŽπšŸπš’πš•, π™·πšŽ πšŠπš’πš—β€™πš πš˜πš— πšπš‘πšŽ πš•πšŽπšŸπšŽπš•!

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It’s like Pascal’s wager, only you know the outcome before you bet.

All the tricky Monkey’s Paw stories were created by humans. Imagine how much more devious an actual demon would be. It’s their job, after all. :imp:

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β€œBut he beat me in the contest, so I had to give him the golden fiddle.”
β€œToo bad. Who was judging?”
β€œNobody needed to. He was a lot better than me.”

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Okay, I’ve spent too much time thinking about this. You really don’t want the watch.

For the watch to work, everything must stop. I assume that you can (hypothetically, more on that later) move anything without any more resistance that you normally would have, or else the first thing that would happen would be that air molecules would shred you like a cheese grater.

Then it occurred to me that you would potentially be in trouble if you stayed in one place for more than a minute or so, as carbon dioxide would quickly build up around your mouth. Least of your problems, of course.

If everything stops, that includes electromagnetic radiation. Otherwise digital and atomic clocks continue, computers keep working (and counting time), anyone sitting down for a minute outside when you click the button gets a sunburn, or if they are looking near the sun or a reflection of it they are now blind. Instead, you are now blind, as light rays are no longer streaming through your environment, bouncing off of things, and reflecting into your eyes. You can kind of see by moving your head forward and effectively impaling frozen light rays on your retinas, but you have to keep moving constantly forward to get any kind of stimulation, and of course leave a wake of no light behind you where things are perfectly dark should you reenter.

That’s not really a problem, though. The vibration of atoms has stopped. This means the temperature outside of your magically disconnected body has now dropped to exactly 0Β° Kelvin. You freeze to death almost instantly. This finally is a good thing, because it prevents you from experiencing what happens next.

Now, many forces are probably no longer in operation, but gravity probably is, since it is more analogous to a distortion of space-time than an active force (assuming mass-giving subatomic particles impart that mass by presence rather than flow). However, since weak electrical force is generated by electron motion, objects no longer resist being passed through. Though they themselves do not move, trapped in time, no longer do they restrain you from the Earth’s gravity, and you plummet towards Earth’s center, where the gravitational force alone squeezes you into the size of a pea, along with the watch.

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:+1:

I would think that just setting up a business and declaring it as income would get the IRS off your back, and if they aren’t interested no one else is likely to be. The actual deposits would probably(?) be well less than $365k, assuming you pay for most things - meals, petrol, groceries, etc - in cash, so you’d get some fluctuation in amounts deposited week-to-week.

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Exhibit A: Elaine Bettis, dancing.

image

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In my fantasy of having this wallet, there are also a lot of anonymous cash donations to food banks and the like! For fun, and to hedge the whole β€œsoul” thing :wink:

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(Not that you are her long time friend who is a jackass to not know, I just liked that there was a quote for this.)

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But what about her cousin, Jerome?

image

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I’m not really sure whether I even have a soul.

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So then it’s a good deal no matter what you pick!

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Watch of sloth! I nick more than a mere 1000 dollars a day in that hour too :smiley:

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