Well that explains a lot.
The ring. Don’t care that I’m getting old, the next twenty years of my life will be the most productive and creative ever, without all that crippling self doubt and hunger for validation. Watch out for my first trilogy of novels, followed by another twenty trilogies and fifty one offs, and endless circuits of the talk shows, and …
I’m exhausted just thinking about it. But yeah, still the ring.
Bonus: there is no soul, so the demon gets nothing. Hah! But wait, it’s a literal demon? Like fire and brimstone, hell hath no fury, horns and steam coming out it’s… nether regions? Might have to rethink the atheism then, and probably would turn down the offer.
Adding: my thinking on each of these -
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Wallet: useful, as long as it adjust for inflation over time (but $365,000 a year plus all debt wiped out is going to be decent for a long time)
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Watch: limited use. One hour of play time? Meh. I’ve seen this movie several times, it’s never a good idea.
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Spectacles: rife for abuse and fuckery, absolutely should avoid. Knowing other people’s secrets gives you blackmail power. And even if it’s used for good (discerning the lies of politicians), you still have to convince everyone ELSE you know the truth. Too problematic.
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Flask of gluttony: sounds nice. I don’t see any real downside here other than I really don’t much care for booze. Can I get it with maybe root beer?
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Gun of Wrath: I really don’t want to murder folks, even if I can get away with it.
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Locket of Lust: very very skeevy. Takes away will and consent on the part of the person you’re having sex with. Don’t like at all. I suspect 20 year old me would have thought this a wonderful idea. Fifty four year old me understands how terrible and vile this power would be.
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Right now the wallet wins hands down. My situation is pretty precarious atm. After that it’s the ring though. Omg I could have used that for finishing my thesis 
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Yeah but what do you do with all the cash? Making the assumption that one is to use their sin in the ‘real’ world, I’m finding it hard to think of a scenario where this becomes workable outside of being forced into money laundering - which can be kinda dangerous. How do you bank it without attracting attention from the tax office? How many ways can you think of spending big notes? Perhaps just lock in having to bury or burn the cash for the rest of your life?
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If the gun can be used at any distance you do not need to approach the ringbearer, on be be able to see him. So you track him get to know his habits and then take him out, no need to go into his house, or even be that near him.
As for ethical use, that assumes that these items don’t corrupt you to the core. You now have no soul, which could be argued is the seat of your conscious/morality, and you have given into a demon so where are your ethical values there, seems you are already corrupt anyway.
That is why the ring bearer and the one with the glasses would be first. It could be argued that the gun, since cursed could be used to bribe the demon into telling you who got the other items. The ring would take time to fully use as would the glasses. The gun seems to be an instant access item.
Not interested in money/violence/coerced sex. Gimme the ring, I’ll be over here quietly getting on with projects. They didn’t mention a downside to that …?
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This is one of those “got’cha” questions isn’t it?
I was going to choose the Gun of Wrath, but then I noticed that the description says, “This pistol will never miss it’s target,” and I was overcome with indescribable disgust. For, you see, I was already wearing the Ring of Pride.
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If that were the case then I would decide which is the worst item to have in the wrong hands and work out where would be the most inaccessible place to put it. I think keeping the Gun of Wrath out of the hands of someone like Putin or Trump wins although I did have to think about it.
Then I would start on my divine legal case that the exchange was coerced and the contract is null and void.
I saw it immediately. I also saw that the Ring of Pride will be an instantly recallable nightmare to anyone with PTSD.
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This is my final desperate cry for help. I haven’t written for so long but there are no options left for me at this point. It started last summer when I accepted the FLASK OF GLUTTONY from that wretched demon. Everything was so good at first, I felt like a twenty-year-old again, and still do! But when money got tight I realized something went horribly wrong. Sure I can eat whatever I want and maintain infinite health, so why couldn’t I get along just eating nothing at all? I tried to curb my habit of eating out 4-5 times a week day and started getting $200-300 in groceries 4-5 times a week instead. But having all that food just made it worse– I could concentrate on nothing except for eating. What good is not having to sleep when your all-nighters are 8-hour gorge fests? My “job” eventually transitioned to “lunch with a half-hour work break” and I got fired.
After maxing out my credit cards, I had to start walking out on (huge) tabs to make ends meet. I’ve alienated all my friends because all I ever care to do is eat. I took them all for what they were worth, even modest Frankie, who only had a bottle of ketchup and mustard in his refrigerator– yep I slurped those down and walked out. Now I’m three months behind on my mortgage and can’t show my face anywhere in town! Last week I got chased out of the park for trapping squirrels! I have no idea what’s going to happen to me tomorrow. Does anyone out there happen to have a magical wallet? Or a way to make someone, anyone, fall in love with me and my appetite?
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Good questions. I hadn’t thought of the real world implications of all that cash.
I think I’d use the first few day’s cash to hire a money manager to figure out how to do it without getting into trouble. Or just move somewhere where they don’t pay attention as much?
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right now yes but what if the us dollar decreases due to too hyperinflation due too rampant increase of the money supply and we all start paying for stuff with phones instead of credit cards?
I’ve read a lot of complains online about the quality of the DVD of the show being really subpar. I wouldn’t know, but i did find the episodes online. Not legit uploads of the show but yeah they’re out there. I would still like to buy the show though.
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And it only works on members of the opposite sex? No lust for non-straights?
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Hopefully I’ll have a good job by then, and in the meantime I will have been able to pay off my debts, travel to see my family and got my passport/visa situation sorted. I’m not too worried about the soul thing. Those don’t exist.
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I dunno … maybe … declare it and pay some fucking tax?
Just because you didn’t “earn” the money doesn’t mean you have to get into a cascading life of crime from that point onwards.
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I hear Mt Doom isn’t getting a lot of foot traffic since the pandemic?
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Demons keep choosing public servants in the steppes for gifting, and the second the officials think of an item husks of exploded cars keep appearing to them. Points to those with demon fighting itches to avoid such fate.
Evert the wallet at the demon’s credit scheme. Even if if fizzles the demon’s lost ratchet accounting for it.
Nerf the lust thing! So hideous it dates Catholicism.
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I was thinking more like avoiding prompting an investigation. I wouldn’t want to draw attention to the wallet in any way at all, because then your life is basically over. So if you have this mysterious flow of cash into an account, it might look like drug money and get the Fed’s on your case.
Seems like some kind of shell corporation set up could work. And I’m all for paying taxes!
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