I’ll be honest, Disneyland can definitely get nuts. Especially on a weekend, and ESPECIALLY during holidays. It’s a very small, compact park, and up until 2016 (thankfully no more), California residents have gotten deep-discount passes, so it’s absolutely mobbed during times when kids are out of school. And it sounds like you got the worst of it, all while having to deal with the special-needs pass situation, which is a shame. I’d be pissed off too if that was my first experience there (especially if I loathed everything Disney to start with).
Yeah, I definitely miss the old Fastpass system at WDW, though they’re making more changes to it after lots of complaints. It’s easier now to do stuff on the fly when you’re there, but it relies on either using the app or a kiosk in the park. In trying to make it easier for the mobs of people to navigate they’ve made it harder for casual visitors, I fear.
Edit: No, Disneyland isn’t using FP+ yet. I was just there and it’s still paper tickets.
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I discovered that if you buy and wear any tiara in the park, every cast member will refer to you as “Princess”. Even if you’re 40. 
The last time I was there, in the disgusting heat of an Anaheim summer, there was a little girl of maybe 5 or 6 in full Maleficent costume. In velvet. Purple lipstick, towering headdress, and all. I said “Great outfit!” and she snarled at me, totally in character. So maybe you can convince them to go as Evil Queens and such instead.
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My wife is one of those well informed organized obsessives who calls in the instant it’s possible, which is good. We had the old system wired and got more things in, but the new system is manageable so long as you stay on top of it. It also made us slow down a little and take things in more instead of being on the day-long dash to maximize Fastness value which is probably a good thing really.
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Very agreed. I travel with a friend who’s a travel agent, and he cheerfully organizes all the rides and reservations, changing them on the fly when needed. There’s less spontaneity, I guess, but there’s also less sprinting for passes at Soarin’ or Space Mountain with an angry mob of parents, so I’m OK with that. It’s much more chilled out. I imagine FP+ will arrive at Disneyland around the time the new Star Wars stuff does in a few years.
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Well, like I said - lesson learned, never again.
If my kids want to go to Disney again they can do it after they have families of their own, because I will never again go through that horror show again.
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