The Huntsman: Winter’s War is a terrible movie, say critics


that’s way too many times for a good tongue twister - try

Winter’s War was a wretched wreck to watch

5 times fast.

or maybe

Grimm’s fables felt grim and gritty.


It’s a LIGHTSABER. And those aren’t dolls. They’re Action Figures!


. But no! Just when we’re nearing the end of the first act… BOOM! more voiceover from Neeson and suddenly WE’RE IN A SEQUEL. That’s right, this movie goes from prequel to sequel in one confusing voiceover. It’s like Director Cedric Nicolas-Troyan couldn’t decide which trope would be most trope-y, so he went with both.

Hey, it works for Joss Whedon.


On the other side of the fairy tale, Kenneth Branagh’s Cinderella takes the story and sands it down like balsa wood. My seven-year old grand-daughter couldn’t figure out who the villain was until halfway through the movie.


One can be a fan (or not) of the underwear perverts and still acknowledge that some underwear pervert movies are good, well made films and some are terrible, shoddy cinematic disasters. I haven’t seen the first movie of this series, but I’ve heard from people who liked it - and still thought this one was terrible (or, at best, so bad it’s good).


I did and somehow Tim Burton appeared by my side.

Now he is asking me if I know where Helena Bonham Carter is and muttering something about not having enough black in my studio.


Branagh has always had trouble when it comes to morals and women…


hate-watching films is a thing? I mean, I’ve done it I guess, but now I have a term for it?


I don’t know if I’d go so far as to say I hate-watch movies but I did see Twilight in the theater opening weekend (last showing on a Saturday in the Bible Belt) because I had it on good authority that it was hilarious.

Only other folks in the theater were drinking vodka so heavily you could smell it from rows away. All 6-7 of us laughing our asses off. The next movie … not so funny. :frowning:

Don’t we all love The Room and Plan 9 From Outer Space for being terrible? :laughing: I prefer to call it Bad Movie Night but I guess it’s kind of the same thing. :sweat:


On the one hand, yes, it’s a terrible movie (in the “so bad it’s almost entertaining” way). On the other hand, for fuck’s sake, people – did anybody actually expect it to be good? It’s not like Snow White and the Huntsman was any sort of cinematic gem or anything.

It wasn’t the worst movie I’ve seen this year at least. That honor would probably go to Allegiant.


This aspect I really don’t mind so much. I mean if you really look at the substance of most of the classic fairy tales they are pretty god damn dark.

Of course Hollywood just goes in and messes it all up as it is wont to do.


I think the point is that when you find a cheap knock-off lightsaber in a dollar store, it’s labelled as a laser sword because it’s too cheap to have the official license; I’m sure the choice of words was deliberate.


Steven Rea, not Stephen Rea! Libelous ginger.

This guy:

Not this guy:


A vital one if you done ask me.


My terribad favourite is The Final Programme. If you haven’t seen it, do yourself a favour & give it a go. I’d love to see more Jerry Cornelius adaptations, but they’d have a hard job topping the cheerfully demented nature of that movie. And Miss Brunner is 70s sexy par excellence.


I enjoyed the movie. It might have been a forgettable generic fantasy, but the lady dwarves turned it around. The first few scenes they took part in sent the audience, myself included, into fits of rolling laughter. I know having dwarves as comic relief is a stale trope, but the ‘dwarf’ part wasn’t what had people laughing. There was some very clever dialog in there and those few scenes alone make the whole movie worth watching. From then on, they carried the movie. Other than that, there is a whole solid generic fantasy movie there with good effects, excellent wardrobes, and good actors and actresses. Critics are always looking for something that breaks the mold, like the next Deadpool or Guardians of the Galaxy, and will thumbs down anything they’ve seen a lot of already. Let yourself enjoy a new take on a familiar theme. In this case, go see the film if you like fantasy movies. The lady dwarves will show up and make it worth your time.


…and brevity. His 4 hour Hamlet deserved all the violence a time traveling Blackadder visited upon William Shakespeare


Dear sweet baby Cthulhu, that one is terrible! The ending on that one made it go from bad and demented to “are you kidding me?”

My all time favorite bad but fun movie, Flash Gordon. Featuring some of Europe’s finest character actors slumming it. Not a piece of scenery left unmasticated and soundtrack by Queen!

When we talk of bad films we love, we talk about bad films which are still watchable for unintentional humor value. We don’t talk about films which are unwatchable or offensive (Cannibal Holocaust and Salo come to mind here).


It’s a tasty world.


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