Theranos but for poop

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/05/21/theranos-but-for-poop.html

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Sounds like a really shitty job.

:poop:

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Funny if someone says you won’t pay for it… X will and then X doesn’t it. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t cough up a cent and say you really ought to discuss with X. Bye thanks. Then again I’m not into mailing shit to people either.

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Yikes. Accidentally read it as Thanos but for Poop.

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Same. If you could develop a technology that instantly turned poo into a sterile dry powder now THAT would be a heck of a best seller.

Unwanted pet waste disappears in a snap!™

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I’ve never dealt with the charlatans; but I have, somewhat recently, dealt with an entity that very specifically promised that out-of-pocket costs would be no more than $X, in most cases insurance covers it and if not we absolutely won’t proceed with the service until you have been informed of, and consented to, the actual cost in your case.

Naturally, I heard nothing until one day I received a bill for almost exactly $20*X along with a document containing some rejection codes that a billing and coding professional I consulted hadn’t previously seen; and an explanation of how I was liable for all charges. And also not the diagnostic results the service was supposed to provide. In the…spirit of generosity…they mentioned both the possiblity of a payment plan and the possibility of sending the account to collections and having me hounded by a dizzying array of ever sleazier collectors; rather than just the latter.

After ~8 months of ongoing negotiation, with some specialist assistance brought in, they mysteriously decided that their earlier reckoning hadn’t been a mistake; but I actually owed them $.87*X.

It sure is a good thing that contract law lives in Libertarian Plato’s realm of The Forms, free from any distortions imposed by wildly disparate power among contracting parties; or I might have been worried there for a bit.

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OMG, me too, multiple times.

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Yeah, but…ONLY HALF.

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This is just part of their plan to have the world’s best poop collection.

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I made the same mistake.

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“Your diet is perfectly balanced. As all things should be.”

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You beat me to it. Life imitating Art?!

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And all this time i’ve been waiting for someone to wade through my shit.

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“Theranos but for…” basically works for pretty much every major American corporation. And now our government too.

Bring on Thanos.

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My late grandfather was a doctor with a heavy NY accent and a sense of humor, and always told his patients to mail their stool samples “turd class”.

https://instantrimshot.com/index.php?sound=rimshot&play=true

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Whoever did that deserves an Emmy.

That is like every cliche and every fucked up trendy level idiocy in one video it even snuck in the Atlas Shrugged and anti union idiotic mentality.

The sad thing is this is practically true of many moronic infomercials for real products and real idiots that follow them

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I don’t want to deal with it directly.

Is there a Juicero, but for poop?

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cutting scientific corners

Yes, that’s very shitty.

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Can we choose which half though? I’m rather fond of a few people on this little marble. :wink:

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