There's now a subscription service for fancy ice pops

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/06/12/theres-now-a-subscription-se.html

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Of course there is.

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Why did they make a bad 80’s commercial?

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Reasons.  

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This will pair well with my non-alcoholic whiskey.

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Will I look like these hot models?

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Ooooh, mango rosemary actually sounds pretty good… but also like something I could make myself with a blender, an ice cube tray, and a lot less than $45 worth of determination.

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Yes! The metaphysical status of food is quite important! I refuse to eat unreal food (but surreal food is fine). Here’s some food for thought: is real food better than ideal food?

Anyways, let’s not blame the ingredients for the names they were given! Really, shouldn’t the blame be put on the person who doesn’t know how to pronounce the word, and not on the thing signified by the word? Or maybe we should blame the person who named it—though they can probably pronounce it. The fact is, pretty much all ingredients have names you can’t pronounce, because, among their many names, there are some names in languages you do not speak (unless you are an omniglot!).

Fearing something you can’t pronounce is a little xenophobic, isn’t it? I say we ought to be cautious of things we know to be cautious of, but we mustn’t tremble when faced with the unknown. To encourage fear of that which we are ignorant is to encourage anti-intellectualism. Don’t be scared: be curious! Learn about what you don’t know before concluding that it’s bad for you!

An ingredient like monosodium glutamate may seem scary because it sounds “sciencey” (and because of 20th century anti-Asian sentiment in the U.S.), but it’s actually a wonderful, legitimate, perfectly healthy ingredient (unless you need to decrease your sodium intake). And we have it thanks to food science! Food science can lead to amazing new ingredients—our skepticism shouldn’t be directed at that endeavor; our skepticism should be directed at the late-stage capitalist market pressures that drive people to use food science for naughty things.

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Only with the platinum subscription.

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gmo-banana1

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I’m sure a certain crowd will think this is a fantastic idea, but between the concept and the picture of the guy, it makes me embarrassed to be a human. Come on, alien overlords!

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Not surprised, here in Austin there’s several high priced “hipster popsicle” joints. Haven’t checked them out because i have better things to do with my time and money.

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The cure for Peyronies Bananas can be found in our lifetime.

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Fancy ice pop flavor of the month.

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I don’t think you’re their target demographic. By a margin.

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I’m not rich, young, or good looking so no.

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I saw an ad for sunscreen with “25% fewer ingredients” recently. What a baffling marketing strategy. Which ingredients have been eliminated? Which have had their quantities increased to compensate? Why don’t they just put “Now with no asbestos!” on the label, instead?

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“Unlike our competitor’s, our products are stamped with the official ‘No Soul-Eating Demons In Here!’ seal of approval.”

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I was wondering why the blonde model required shooter’s glasses to eat a popsicle:

Link to shooting glasses explainer

“Lens tints also can be a factor in the performance of shooting glasses. Many shooters are comfortable in lenses that are yellow or orange. Lenses in these hues block haze and blue light and usually enhance the contrast between the target and its background. The brighter yellow the lens color is, the better it is for use in low contrast and near-dark conditions.”

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This is one of my favorite comments on the BBS so far.

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