Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/09/05/this-gnarly-handboard-is-the-p.html
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Probably this is masking an utterly crap product, but it could be simply utterly crap marketing that on both occasions in the 23 second video that we actually saw it being used in the water on a wave, the video cut away at precisely the moment any viewer would have expected to start seeing how this thing actually performed.
Given the past evidence of StackCommerce’s marketing ‘expertise’, my inclinations are toward the latter, but I guess they could be good enough at ‘marketing’ to know when not to show just how much a product actually fails to deliver its claimed features and benefits.
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It is simply put an utterly useless product. And a simple foam board of this sort is typically found at drug stores in beach towns for $10.
You’ll typically find these things bought by tourists for their kids, because they’re cheap and they sound cool. But they don’t make body surfing any easier, and actually hamper your ability to swim which is essential to body surfing. And hands forward like that is not how you do this.
It doesn’t look like a particularly crap product, looks pretty standard for this sort of thing. But it’s just not a thing that’s worthwhile. For forty bucks you can get a decent boogie board or skim board. Either of which will actually do something.
A lot of stuff on the BB shop are close outs and leftovers from collapsed companies. Dollars to doughnuts whatever kids toy fad saw these all over beach towns 3 years ago is over and done with. And this company is stuck with a warehouse of premium foam blocks that aren’t moving.
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I’ve been bodysurfing for around 55 years, and I would strongly disagree. A hand, or hands forward is exactly how you do this. A hand plane is often very useful, depending on conditions. I have several, for different waves. Even so, I sometimes go without one, and even leave the fins behind sometimes. But both fins and planes can make a huge difference. Serious body surfers use them.
Now, the product here, pitched to beginners, is of questionable value. I don’t think anyone should take a plane into the water when they are just learning. Fins can also be more of a hinderance for learners, who will be more comfortable starting out standing and launching themselves into a wave. Gear or no gear, the main thing is to enjoy the water, and understand the nature and power of waves and how to have fun and protect yourself while doing so. There’s no substitute for experience, and someone to clue you in when you’re learning.
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The Superman rules!
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In my dismal opinion, body surfing requires one of two conditions and sometimes both:
- You need to have a body type conducive to greater buoyancy – i.e. all the folks I know who body surf successfully are women – I suspect it’s because they’ve got a more even fat distribution (maybe someone into physiology could correct my assumption)…
- You need the right kind of surf conditions.
Most people have better experiences with body boards… when I was a kid we just called them Boogie Boards. (edit) You just paddle out to the break, and relax while bobbing up and down on the swells until that right wave comes along then start paddling like mad.
Especially on rides in to the beach!
It’s a rip off of a Hand Gun. We surfed with these 40 years ago.
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