Originally published at: This 'Toys R Us' commercial is a nostalgic wonder | Boing Boing
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Aww, this reminds me of being in elementary school and very much loving the occasional treks to Toys R Us (as well as more frequent visits to the local Kay Bee Toys). I totally remember this ad heheh. 
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As tends to happen in Hollywood, some of those kids went on to bigger roles. Jaleel White (“Urkel”) is the most famous, which is probably why he didn’t appear in the “update” version of the ad:
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Jenny Lewis revisited this commercial in the video for her song “She’s Not Me”.
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Many years ago, myself and my brother have composed some alternate lyrics about someone going on a drinking binge, and is now paying the price for those antics.
I don’t want to throw up, for what I did
I really got hammered, and I’m a squid
Ready the toilet and lift the lid
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I still use this one:
I don’t wanna get up
I wanna stay in bed
I went to sleep at 3 AM and I’m feeling dead
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Family was from Alaska, no Toys-R-Us this was the early 80’s. We’re down in Oregon visiting my moms family and our relatives decide to take us to a Toys-R-Us. I’m like 4, almost 5 years old and feeling pretty overwhelmed as the store was twice the size of the largest store we had in Juneau and it was just toys in there. We go in and my mom takes my sisters off to some corner of the store and my dad and I wander over to the sports section. My dad puts some oversized boxing gloves on me and lets me punch him in the stomach a bunch of times. He doesn’t even flinch so I’m amazed at how these gloves block any force from actually hitting the person. Then my dad goes, hey, when your mom comes around the corner you should try giving her a shot. Now remember I’m like 5 and convinced I have magic pillow gloves that makes it so no matter how hard I hit someone they don’t even flinch or feel it since my dad didn’t react to any of my punches no matter how hard I hit him. So I hear my mom talking to my sisters as they round the corner of the aisle behind me and in one motion I turn and swing with everything I got right at mom’s stomach. She makes a horrible sound as the air is knocked out of lungs and she doubles over and then falls onto her side on the ground making this horrible face like when you’ve pulled a fish out of the ocean and it’s just gasping for water but there isn’t any. My dad then yells “Jesus!? What were you thinking!?” and then gets down on the ground as my mom is gasping for air and crying and I’m trying not to freak out as I’m looking at these boxing gloves and can’t figure out why they didn’t do anything to my dad but nearly killed my mom. Anyways I got spanked when we got home and got put on restriction and wasn’t able to go swimming or do anything fun with my relatives for a few weeks and was forced to sit on the sidelines as they had fun. My dad to this day claims he never (even jokingly) told me to hit my mom with those gloves. So my only take away from Toys-R-Us as a kid was that adults lie.
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The silhouette of the kid leaning into Geoffrey at the end always got me right here
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Down in FL (early/mid-90s) we had a mock rhyme to this song too:
I don’t wanna grow up,
I’m an HRS* kid
My mommy doesn’t love me and my daddy never did!
The whips and chains, the childhood pains
something something something
FL was always f-ed up.
*Health and Rehabilitative Services, now Dept of Children and Families (DCF)
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