People sometimes get trapped or die from non-Tesla related causes, why aren’t we talking about that?! I’m surprised no one has brought this up before, it’s on page two of the manual.
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Wow, it’s almost as though reality itself conjured an example of why all the “read the manual” people are shortsighted morons who don’t understand safety. But they were so strong in their convictions, surely they’re going to show up here today and explain to us why the toddler, her grandma and the firefighters were all at fault here rather than the brilliantly designed Tesla that turns into a convenient coffin the instant it loses power.
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Here we go again…
How long until someone blames the toddler for not reading the manual and opening the door themselves?
How long until someone blames the mother for attempting to operate a vehicle that’s clearly too advanced for her to comprehend due to the limitations of her womanly brain?
How long until someone blames the firefighters for daring to defile the precious machine rather than pausing their rescue efforts to pull up the manual on their phones to understand how to safely open the door.
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Toddler trapped in a Tesla after its battery discharged
I blame the mother. If she was so negligent that she didn’t keep her toddler fully charged, it’s obviously her fault.
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Fully charged toddlers are a severe risk. Keep them charged between 80% max and 20% min. It’s in the toddler manual, people!
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And never carry them in checked luggage.
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My 2003 Ford Windstar has a battery cutoff so the battery will always have enough juice to start if you leave the key on.
Seems like a fancy company like Tesla could have an isolated battery just for the door locks.
Even my 28 year old RV has a simple solenoid to link all the batteries in an emergency.
Maybe I’ll give Elon a call.
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The majority of cars have them both on the inside AND outside! Sometimes it really is the simplest things that work best.
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Is it her fault for not buying a rescue tool and keeping it on her at all times? Or is it Tesla’s for not providing one with easy access on the outside of the car (and another one inside as well)?
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Depressingly, studies have shown that of the mothers who carry such a tool, only 43% even bother to read the manual.
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From Dr. Spock’s lips to god’s ears as they say.
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I got an older car (2010), but I don’t like how fancy and electronic cars are with like the new touch screens. There is something to be said for mechanical controls, like radio knobs and buttons. Things you can find by feel.
For doors, please just have a mechanical latch. It just doesn’t make sense to make everything “fly by wire”. Especially if you’re “trapped” if the battery or electronics are dead. A hard to use emergency release, that’s impossible for young kids to use isn’t a good back up. Someone is going to lose a kid in a car fire or water or something and that’s fucking tragic and scary - and at this point - inevitable.
I had a friend who fought electric windows for the longest time, until the old cranks were no longer an option, but I am not that bad.
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Does the Tesla even have physical manuals? With Musk, I’d expect that you have read it on the car screen, after powering it up enough to get the door open and then reboot it, so that you can read it, and then send a message back in time telling you how to do that.
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Be sure to reverse the ahem charges.
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I’m now imagining some kid out there being drilled on the procedure and then later proceeds to pop the door open while the Tesla is in motion, because most likely this emergency latch does not obey the childproof lock.
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Alas, Teslas use laminated glass, not safety glass, so even though the windows break with trivial effort in normal use, they don’t shatter safely, so the safety hammer won’t work properly either.
Otherwise, firefighters wouldn’t have so much trouble getting in.
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Have a sub? You merely have to say you have a sub whilst repeatedly shitposting “pedo guy” don’t cha know! 
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It looks like that is the link for opening the door from the inside (as discussed elsewhere at length).
The other link is for opening the hood (bonnet) and once that is achieved you have to charge the low voltage battery (another, more complicated, link) presumably when that is charged or partially charged you can open the door as normal.
You have to wonder what was going through the minds of designers and engineers, or, more probably, management.
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High-kicking dollar signs, dancing around in a circle while vegas showgirl-esque music plays, like an old-fashioned cartoon, maybe. Probably.
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