Trump the Chump (Part 1)

Yoink!

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Monopoly Top Hat Nixonphile Roger Stone says trump is announcing a ‘24 run next week.

Timely isn’t it?

Also, here’s a load of crap:

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Exactly. The testimony doesn’t say that 45 did a backflip, extruded himself through a wrapping paper roll, and came out the other side driving the vehicle on Engel’s lap. It says he tried and failed to take control of the vehicle. That doesn’t take a particular set of skills.

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Failing is pretty much Il Douche’s superpower. He is… FailureMan!! Able to fail at the most mundane tasks! Able to fall on his face wiping his ass! There is no task at which he cannot fail, for he is…

FailureMan

(I don’t have the graphic skills to do this justice, but I am pretty proud of the concept!)

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Definitely misspelled must there.

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Fear not, our electronic overlords have it covered:

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Can we hold off on the breathless reporting until it actually happens, please? Also, please happen soon!

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Praying I Hope GIF by The Paley Center for Media

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You no wanna bite on the nutrition-free clicky bait?

City Life Art GIF by Sherchle

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Donald Trump Wants to Sue Lisa Page, Peter Strzok, but Can't Find Them

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The takeaway from that story:

  • Trump wants the former FBI agents to walk into Trump’s attorney’s office and politely ask for their subpoenas.
  • And if they’re unwilling to do this, he thinks that the DOJ should take care of serving the subpoenas because he’s still dillusional and thinks the DOJ is his private law firm.
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One of the appraisal companies that help Trump build his fortune on a throne of lies is now stuck between a rock and a hard place: either turn over documents on Trump’s business practices (thus making themselves a target of Trump’s wrath and likely implicating themselves in various criminal activities) or stand in contempt of court and pay $10K a day in fines. So far they’re going the “contempt” route.

I hope every single one of Trump’s business partners goes down in flames with him.

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Normally the bank offering the mortgage uses their own appraisers.

Trump actually convinced banks to accept appraisals from a separate company they didn’t hire?

This means certain bankers did not do proper due diligence, and should also be investigated.

Banking laws are federal, and you do not mess around with them.

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Start doubling it every day they don’t comply.

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I suggest a duel.

The cliffs of Weehawken aren’t far from Trump Bedminster.

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DeSantis is a terrible person, but I don’t remember so many disasters happening when he was president. Actually I don’t remember anything about him being president at all.

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That’s because you’re not a super genius with a 12th level quantum mind that can pierce the multiversal veil like Donnie two scoops.

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