Turkey's Erdoğan"threw" Trump's threatening letter "in the bin"

He Googled “Turkey tough” and read cooking tips on Chowhound.

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Obligs:

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I can believe that he aactually wrote this one. All by himself.

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Next to a bunch of hunting trophies.

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Or that Trump is all talk, no walk. Boom and bluster with zero muster. A schoolyard bully that can’t think beyond himself. A fucking idiot.

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Of course Erdoğan threw the letter in the garbage. What else would you do with it, as an absurd piece of insulting trash? The fact that Trump thought it was a good letter is so damning of not just Trump, but everyone around him, all those who support him - hell, the whole damn country, really.

That presumes Trump understands, well, something, and that what he says has meaning. He’s got a collection of stock phrases he used to use that meant something in that context, but doesn’t have the cognitive ability needed to adjust to the situation he’s now in.

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He probably had to ask Stephen Miller to help him print it out so he could “sign” it, though.

Seriously, at least my name has all of the vertical ascenders that would lead a hastily-scrawled signature to look like that. Who the fuck’s name is he even signing?

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I’m honestly surprised it’s not signed in gold sharpie.

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I’m sure this is fine.

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“We won’t forget this insult” is exactly the response you are looking for in diplomacy. Or I assume that’s what Trump will tell us soon.

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This is the world we’re in for: blustering strongman leaders yelling empty threats at one another, until eventually one isn’t so empty.

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I’d assumed it was Lynyrd Skynyrd.

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Duh, eBay.

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Problem is: no one would believe it’s real. (It was only when the White House released it - and then, when asked, verified it was real - that anyone accepted it actually was real.)

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giphy

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I may now have a business fabricating presidential statements. It’d be too easy - at this point, almost anything could be real…

(Just need to work on that signature, which is way too complicated for something that doesn’t even remotely say “Donald Trump.” What does it actually say? “Anal Grammy!” ?)

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Not that he ever writes anything else by hand, but I’d be interested to know what a hand writing analysis would reveal…

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Graphologists are probably half a step removed from phrenologists, but:

I suspect a neurologist could probably detect something of his cognitive decline via changes in his signature, though.

It’s interesting to look at earlier versions of his signature, which were more readable. They also don’t look like “Donald Trump,” though. They still have too many letters/squiggles, with the end of his name already having a spike upwards that’s definitely not a “p,” so his earlier efforts looked like he was signing “Bowel Trumpland.”

Small hands.

Totally a cheap shot, actually. Small hands are great! No one should ever be ashamed.

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