Using canned ham as a car bumper guard

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So much better than those unattractive Bumper Bully things - not only does this prevent scratches, it’s an emergency food source in case you get stuck in the snow or something. Unless the racoons get it first.

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Even as a pretty hardcore leather-wearing meat-eater, I find it sort distasteful that this was what a couple of pigs died for.

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Yeah, on some level I know that this was never going to be delivered to some needy family, but at the same time - well, wasting food is wasting food.

You could get similar results with a string of stale bread loaves. Less of a chance of attracting swarms of coyotes to the scene of a collision.

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I totally agree, but at the same time It’s OK.

Canned hams are the whoopee cushions of food.

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Let’s be honest, those pigs died for bacon, actual ham, and maybe even pork rinds. If the mechanically separated leftovers hadn’t made it into the TREET can, they would have gone into the trash.

Was this wasteful? Absolutely. But I sincerely doubt that there are pigs slaughtered specifically so that they can be turned into pink gunk. That there is a market for that leftover pink gunk is a fortunate and mystifying turn of events.

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Torchinsky is hands-down the best thing about Jalopnik since Murilee left.

To the scene scent of a collision.

And this is how they make SPAM.

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remember when Letterman put a canned ham into a hydraulic press?

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This is but one of the thousands of reasons that that I love Jason. That, and he’s buddies with my super-weirdo friend Tom Jennings.

He either has invisible cans or that’s un-canned ham.

You say that as if it was a good thing!

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